Taylor goes to Japan

1 - The great con

Kanne and I had become friends through Reddit after we commented on a cosplay post. I had more-or-less-randomly-by-accident clicked on her profile and saw she’s into cosplay and stuff. I like the costumes she makes so I sent her a message to tell her that and she replied a few weeks later.

We exchanged a few messages and soon we were talking on iMessage and we quickly discovered that we really like each other as friends.

And who am I? I’m just boring Taylor Long. Nobody special. I live in Houston, Texas. I’m 19 and have short blonde hair and a freckled face. I'm told that my bright green eyes are my best feature. My last boyfriend said so anyway, but we broke up a while ago. I guess I look fine in a bikini but prefer a more modest swimsuit because I'm shy about myself. But whatever. I don't know how to swim anyway.

I’m not really into cosplay myself. I mean, I like it, it's cool to see it. But I don't really care to do it myself. I'd probably be too scared to wear anything in public anyway. So really, I'll just watch.

My friend Kanne is 24 years old, she's a slender Japanese woman who looks great in everything she wears. I think she looks really pretty. She says that she is a semi-professional cosplayer. Kanne makes some of her own costumes and goes to shows with them. She lives in Nagoya, a city a few hours west of Tokyo.

We talk about a lot of things. Actually, I do most of the talking, about anything. My life and its boring routine. Boyfriends I had in the past. My problems and issues. Things I dream about. And of-course we talk about Anime a lot too. I naively believe she’s my best friend who kindly listens to all my crap and who thinks I'm funny.

And why not? She's often online, and seems to genuinely like to talk to me. But really, I have nothing to offer her but my time.

I'm vaguely aware of this fact but I ignore it.

At some point I had sort of fantasized that I might lose my shyness if I could wear a good cosplay costume and nobody would recognize me. A few weeks later I had joked that I imagined that cosplayers should wear sex toys under their outfits to make things exciting.

Kanne had said she never thought about that but found the idea interesting.

When the topic of me doing cosplay came up again, she promised me that if we'd ever meet she would have a costume for me to wear. I didn't think anything of it at the time. Because, why would that ever happen? So I just jokingly agreed. I immediately forgot the conversation because more important things were happening, the new episode of an anime TV show we watch together.

At some point Kanne divulged that she likes to have a kigurumi doll. She collects figurines, small statues of her favorite characters. Some are a few inches tall. Others are bigger, like ten inches maybe? It's kinda cool. But Kigurumi is different. It's a practice where someone dresses up in a full bodysuit and wears a mask modeled after an anime character. Or just has a generic anime face. And with that, becomes the doll.

I laughed at it when she showed me some pictures and wished her good luck in finding someone to be her doll and immediately forgot about her silly fantasy.

After a year of chatting our schedules aligned, and for some reason she invited me to meet and go to an Anime Convention together. I jumped out of my chair with excitement. A real cosplayer inviting me to 'her' world? How super cool is that!?

And so I went to Tokyo in Japan for a two week vacation to enjoy anime with one of my best friends.

She had organized an AirBnB that a friend owns and we'll stay there together. She had picked me up from the Airport the day before the convention. And after we settled into the AirBnB I sort of passed out from exhaustion. I hate flying, it's so tiring.

Kanne didn't mind and just worked on the cosplay she'd be wearing tomorrow. When I wake up that evening and check on what Kanne is doing, she has a surprise for me. I can wear her Haru Nishimura cosplay.

She had finished adjusting the sizing so the outfit would fit me and kinda insists that I wear it to the convention tomorrow. I feel I can’t refuse after she made such an effort and was actually kind of flattered with the idea. I didn’t think anything of it and agreed when I saw the basic outfit.

We both like the Xam’d TV series, and in it Haru is a young woman chasing after the lead character. I really like Haru because of how determined she is, and getting the chance to become her seems super cool to me. What's even better, the outfit includes a bodysuit and one of those Kigurumi masks Kanne had talked about weeks ago.

The mask fully encapsulates the wearer's head. This means that nobody can recognize me, or even know I'm not Japanese, which boosts my confidence.

Kanne is going to play Ishu Benikawa, another character from the Xam’d franchise.

This morning we're about to get dressed and it is revealed that there are a few things Kanne didn't tell me about the costume.

“A gag?”

“Yes look, it’s not big…” Kanne shows the inside of the mask that has a squishy little dildo inside.

“Oh ok…” I'm not looking forward to that.

“It’ll be fine. Just don't think about it.” Kanne assures me.

I agree reluctantly. This revelation on top of having to be naked in front of her has me very nervous.

My hands shake when I strip off my clothes and underwear. No woman has ever seen me naked. Certainly not a woman I've met less than 24 hours before. When I stand naked before her with my back turned she helps me into the lycra bodysuit making sure my arms and head fit nicely. The suit almost covers me completely, leaving only my face uncovered, and has a zip on the back.

Not feeling fingers I automatically ball up my hands and make fists and I casually lose control of my hands.

"What's this Kanne?" I whimper as I hold up my stumpy arms that resemble Haru making fists.

“That’s how it works, it’ll look better this way with the mask.” Kanne casually informs me and she pulls the fabric around my wrists tight with hidden velcro straps. Even if I could grab anything the arms are not coming off now. The pockets for my hands are so small I can't even wiggle my fingers.

“Yeah right…” I had refused her explanation but Kanne looks serious and just moves around me telling me I look good. She adjusts my waist in a similar way with velcro straps that sit on my lower back and behind my breasts. The lycra looks really smooth in the front, accentuating my breasts like a second skin. It pulls between them and I even have cleavage.

Before I realize what she's doing she pokes a dildo into my vagina. Not prepared for it I yelp and protest, but she shushes me and claims it will help keep the body suit in place. Kind of like a tack or nail keeps things in place.

I don't believe her but I meekly watch her work in silence. She's the professional after-all. What does nerdy Taylor know about professional cosplaying, right?

Kanne crawls behind me and a buttplug is pressed between my cheeks. I squeal and step away. This is getting out of hand.

“What the fuck are you doing?!?” I demand.

“Taylor, it’s real cosplay… C’mon the suit needs to sit right.”

“You wear this?” I ask.

Kanne assures me she does sometimes, all real cosplayers do.

Of-course she doesn’t, Kanne never even thought about it before Taylor mentioned it a few months ago. But it's part of her plan to have her doll.

I don't believe her, but it's also kind of exciting. And I think back to our talk from ages ago where I suggested cosplayers do this for fun.

"You're just doing this because I made a joke about it right?" I meekly ask her.

"Something like that, it'll be fun though." Kanne says trying to remain serious.

I relent for some reason and say nothing more. Thinking I'll just remove them in a toilet while at the convention or something.

Kanne says nothing and fidgets with the buttplug as it settles and zips up the bodysuit over my crotch.

The zip is tight and pulls the suit into my buttcrack and tightly over my vagina lips. It's now shaped perfectly to my body. It's tight in many places and I might as well be naked as it shows all of my curves and shapes clearly. A thing Kanne attributes to the plugs and velcro.

I don't buy it though, and I start to suspect she's up to something.

She then dresses me in Haru’s outfit that's laid out on her bed. The actual costume consists of a grey skirt that ends just above my knee. A white short sleeve blouse covered by a blue woolen sleeveless jumper and a bright orange armband on my left arm.

Seeing myself transform in the mirror I forget about my hands and the plugs for the moment.

“Look how different I look already! So cool!” I compliment the costume when I wear all the items. This is actually really cool, to dress up in a professionally made costume I mean.

Kanne just smiles devilishly and starts with the mask.

This goes rather quick as Kanne presses the back to the back of my head and swivels the front down like a welders cap. With some hesitation I open my mouth for the gag to enter. The dildo slides rousingly over my tongue and seems impossibly long, but before I can protest Kanne pushes on the front and the mask clicks shut.

click, click

Two clasps on the left and right snap in place. I've seen these before on other masks, they're just behind my ears. But unknown to me, Kanne twists a tumbler key in both clasps and locks the mask in place.

I open my eyes and see nothing. The mask has no eyes for me. Just the bright blue Haru eyes on the outside. I immediately feel uncomfortable and ‘mmph’ into the gag. But Kanne taps my head and whispers that I’m her doll now.

I don't get it and stamp my feet in anger and she just snorts at my childish response.

"Taylor, please. It'll be fun. I won't let anything happen to you ok? Just follow my lead." Kanne tries to calm me down with her sweet voice. She's really close to my 'face' when she says this, probably putting the wig on my head.

And stupidly enough I listen to her. I do calm down. Did I mention I'm not very outspoken if someone talks down to me?

Such a fool.

I just stand there stupidly thinking it'll be fun like she said. I'm wearing professional cosplay gear after-all. Custom made for me no less. I also try to talk to Kanne, but I can't. I sigh and let my head hang, waiting for what she'll do next. Doubting my choices for the day. I realize I won't be able to see anything at the convention either.

Yeah, no. This is not how things should be. I decide.

She lifts my face, presumably we look each other in the eyes, and she fidgets something around my throat. I hear a soft click.

"There's your tie! Hello Haru! You look so cute!" Kanne announces with a cheer.

I try to smile in the mask thinking it might be a fun day after all and wonder what I look like. Nothing happens for a few moments but suddenly she fidgets under my skirt just below my butt and finally she pushes me two steps backwards.

"Sit little Haruuuuu… Almost dohoone." She sounds like she's talking to a toddler.

I sit on the bed that's there and Kanne has me wear knee length white socks and finally fits shoes on my feet.

"All done! Socks, and shoes for my little Haruuuu!" That mommy voice again. I always thought Kanne was more mature. But maybe she's just excited.

I mumble through my gag that my name is Taylor and not 'little Haru'.

Kanne laughs and informs me that she can't understand a thing I say.

I sigh and wonder why I agreed to this. But I didn't really, did I? When I place my feet down and stand up both plugs inside me expand rapidly and I squeal. I quickly sit back down and lift my feet and they deflate.

Kanne laughs again and tells me, "Left foot for the front, right foot for the rear."

"Ohmoooo! Hy!?!" (Oh Noooo! Why!?!) I whine. But Kanne doesn't answer.

Kanne has devised a devious system and made it so that every time the heel of my left foot gets any weight on it the vagina plug inflates. Every time my right foot gets to the ground the one in my butt inflates. They deflate when I lift my foot. There must be little balloons in the heels of my shoes or something.

I fall backwards on her bed and 'stare' at the ceiling. Well my mask does, I guess. Going to the convention is quickly losing its appeal and I wish I was in Houston watching the live stream of the event instead. Or better yet, I wish I never met Kanne.

Some more fidgeting under my chin and suddenly the gag grows. It fills my entire mouth and the tip pushes into my throat. I can hear the inflating bulb being squeezed over and over.

Pssp Pssp Pssp Pshp Pssp Psp Pssp Pssp Pssp Psp Pssp Psp Pssp Phsp Pssp Pssp Pssp

Seventeen times she squeezes and I retch and choke on the gag as it forces itself four inches deep into my throat. I don't really know how long it is, but it feels like it's reaching all the way down into my stomach.

I scream but I can barely make any sound at all. No air passes along my vocal cords anymore because of the dildo. And what little sound I produce is so minimal that even in the quiet room Kanne can't hear me. I convulse and spasm from the intrusion. I desperately try to push the thing from my throat and paw at my mask with my stumped hands, but it's firmly held in place by the mask.

"Now… I could be mean and fill the gag with rubber cement. But I think it’ll save that for another time…"

I faintly nod and hum in agreement. I have never even sucked a dick that went past my tonsils. And I wonder why Kanne thinks this is acceptable. Me nodding causes me to convulse again, and I again try to dislodge the gag. I have a very strong gag-reflex it seems. Kanne probably can’t really tell since she makes no attempt to help me.

After a few minutes it stops and I'm forced to focus on rapid breathing, which has become a chore in itself.

"Listen to you, breathing so rapidly… Take it easy Haru, or you'll start hyperventilating. It'll be much easier if you take slow deep breaths." Kanne instructs me. I try to control my nervous panting and find that she's right. But still, breathing is hard and I barely get enough air.

"That's better. When you're ready to go nod twice ok?" Kanne praises me.

I shake my head twice. I don't want to go anywhere.

Nothing happens for a while and I assume Kanne is getting her own costume ready. I focus on breathing, I've never felt so weird in my life and I consider my conflicted feelings.

I hear Kanne's voice again. She sort of apologizes for what she did. But not really, she's way too casual about it. She tells me I'll be her doll for the day. Just as we had talked about once. At the end she has a big surprise for me, since I'm such an anime fan. And she promises that tomorrow I can see the convention for myself. But today is her day. Doing what she wants.

I hear this 'plan' of hers and hate Kanne for tricking me. She betrayed my trust. And I don't remember talking about wanting to be a doll, but I assume she's referring to my stupid idea of wearing toys during cosplay.

She’s not.

Surprisingly, the double plugs in me are arousing me. So that's kinda OK, I guess. Unwanted, but bearable. And the helpless feeling I get from losing my sight and the use of my hands is extremely exciting for some reason. But then the scare of not being able to breathe freely, not so much…

And really, do I want to wear this outfit? This is not good at all.

I exhale with a long sigh and because I was already short on breath, I run out of air and choke and convulse while trying to take a deep breath. And well, you get the idea. I'm not at all happy, yet aroused.

So what the fuck!?

Kanne grabs my wrists and pulls me upright to a sitting position. She doesn't say anything but presumably she's staring into my eyes with an evil grin or something.

Actually she's taking a selfie with me. After a few seconds I'm pulled to my feet and both plugs inflate.

I squeal and force myself to stand on my toes, but of-course this doesn’t last and after a while I slowly sink to stand on flat feet, groaning as the plugs expand inside me.

Kanne had apparently been watching me and laughs.

“Now just follow my lead and do exactly as you’re told, Taylor. You’re a doll from now on.” She sounds very strict and demanding now.

“Uh-huh…” I nod twice in agreement.

"Ready then?" She wants to know, seeing my two nods.

I don't listen to her and struggle with my thoughts. This Kanne is very different from the one I knew from chatting with her. Is she even really my friend? Or why is she doing this? I can’t make up my mind about it. I stand in the room for a while contemplating why this is happening to me, but I can’t think of any reason why she would be so mean to me. I catch myself slowly pedaling on the spot, slightly lifting my left and right heel as I'm playing with the plugs.

Stop it Taylor! I curse myself. Control yourself. This is not funny or enjoyable. But my body disagrees.

Maybe I'm just her gullible fool.

2 - Enjoying the convention

I'm Haru Nishimura. Or… The character I'm playing is called that. My real name is Taylor. I've been standing in what I assume is the entrance hall of the convention, shuffling forward as if I'm in a queue. All the while Kanne has a firm grip around my upper arm.

I think we took a taxi here, some car anyway, and I'm constantly wiggling on my feet fucking myself slowly with the inflating plugs as I wait for the next step forward. I'm incredibly aroused and I hate my body for enjoying this, yet feel miserable because of the enormous dildo down my throat and because I can't see a thing.

I want to be free and see anime!

There are people around Haru, ehh me. They are oblivious of the suffering going on right next to them, or even who’s inside of the beautifully made suit. The happy chatter and laughs, clearly everyone is having a way better time than me.

Krrrk

The turnstile churns as I'm pushed through. I stumble a few steps forward in my darkness.

krrrrrk

Sounds the turnstile right behind me and my arm is grabbed again. We walk for a little while and with a soft tug on my arm I'm left alone.

The people around me see a cute teenage girl with a determined face and a slender body in a skin colored full bodysuit. She’s wearing a vaguely familiar school uniform. The orange armband is clearly visible. Many assume it’s the uniform from an anime from years ago but most onlookers aren’t familiar with anything from over a decade ago.

Her pale face is framed with matte orange hair and her wide open blue eyes have a look of determination, just like the character in the anime so often had. I'm not smiling inside the mask though, or feeling all that determined. I feel terribly uncomfortable and focus on my breathing. Someone touches me and I’m led away. I try to make a sound but with all the voices around me, nothing is heard.

The noise around me becomes more subdued, as if we're in a different room and an unknown male voice says something in Japanese near my ear.

I squeal and struggle in his grip, but I can't get loose and run away. Yeah, run away while being blind… I’ll run straight into a wall! And even if I can find a door, I have no hands.

I’m frozen with fear. Where is Kanne?

A question is asked and I just dumbly nod and try to make my distress heard. A hand slides up my leg and under my skirt, I get a firm squeeze in my Lycra butt. I squeal and want to step away but another set of hands holds me in place by my shoulders. Suddenly a tug on my shoulders and the hands disappear.

I aimlessly punch around me with my stumpy hands but I hit nothing and I twist my body and yell into the gag. A man shouts something as if he’s commanding me to do something. I speak no Japanese of-course so I have no idea what's going on.

At least three men grumble something. They sound disappointed, but maybe they’re just having fun at my expense?

I feel some fidgeting at my neck and I hear the click of something. I am then yanked by a leash back into the noises of the crowd and am led through it. Kanne's 'tie' is actually a collar it seems. I'm so baffled at what just happened I don't resist and just stupidly follow the leash.

The plugs rapidly inflate and deflate as I stumble blindly after the unknown person. It’s so frustrating and scary and good and annoying and arousing, all at the same time. I wonder how cosplay players do this all day. The gag too, nobody does that right?

And where the fuck is Kanne? This is so not how I envisioned how this day would go. I tear up inside the mask and cry uncontrollably.

Haru keeps smiling on the outside.

I then blindly bump into someone, the man leading me around has stopped and he says something. Kanne's voice is heard and sounds worried for a second but then laughs.

“I see my boyfriend found you.” Her voice comes from right next to my ear.

“Don’t wander off again OK? Lots of perverts around as you just discovered.”

Wander off? I was led away! And, Kanne has a boyfriend? She never mentioned that. Is the stern voice him? Did he just rescue me from a bunch of perverts? Was that the hand on my skirt? Some kind of predator? Or is he the pervert, with his leash?

I have many questions and I don’t get it at all. I then consider that all of this might be a huge set up, and that they’re making a fool out of the dumb American tourist.

I punch at where Kanne’s voice had come from but I hit nothing but air. Then I struggle with my leash and try to make it known that I’ve had enough but a short tug on it has me stop.

“Don’t fidget little Haru, or we’ll punish you… Think of the rubber cement, right?” Kanne jokingly says in my ear.

Punish me? What the fuck does that even mean!

Kanne then says something in Japanese that I don’t understand and a man sounds like he agrees. And with a tug on my leash we start walking again.

I’m being led around on the leash for what feels like days, neither Kanne or the mystery boyfriend pays any attention to me and I just blindly follow them like a stupid dog. I bump into people. People step on my toes. Nobody pays attention to me it seems. And all I can do is follow the tug of the leash.

When I pull back on the leash or refuse to move there is a curt tug on it and I have to stumble along anyway.

I hate everything about Kanne and her asshole boyfriend. I hate my body for soaking my crotch with my arousal as the plugs tease me endlessly. I also hate my body for responding like a fucking slave masochist to this whole ordeal. What's up with that? How can I, or anyone, enjoy this?

I feel very very confused with myself.

It's mid-afternoon, unknown to me I've been led around on my leash for five hours. I'm starting to get tired. Another problem I started to have about an hour ago is that I really really really want an orgasm. I don’t care if it’s here in the middle of the crowd. I just want to cum and get some relief.

I whine and moan near constantly now but nobody hears me.

Kanne is having a great time it seems, she laughs and talks a lot. People respond to her too I think. But I have no idea really. Everyone speaks Japanese and I feel super lonely and isolated between the thousands of people around me.

Unknown to Taylor she's being led from spot to spot for photos and to collect souvenirs, Kanne shows her off to everyone who even half looks at them. Kanne's boyfriend collects many goodie-bags and they have a great time with Taylor in tow.

Another tug on my leash and I’m led somewhere again.

“Quit fucking around and stand straight.” Kanne hisses when I shake my head to make the mask more comfortable and paw at my crotch for the 1000th time. To onlookers it probably looks like I urgently want to pee.

With this mean sounding instruction Kanne finally acknowledges my existence after hours of being ignored. Her voice directed at me sounds so good and eases my loneliness a tiny bit.

“Ehre ah ie?” (Where are we?) I try to figure out where we are, but my surroundings are so loud that nobody, not even Kanne, hears it. There is music and sounds of anime coming from every direction. I hear the murmur of dozens, or even hundreds, of people. I guess it's really getting busy at the convention now.

Or I hope that that is where we are. I've been here for hours, but I actually don't know if this is the Anime convention or not. We might as well be at a job fair.

Suddenly my lycra covered arm is grabbed and I’m led away. I'm completely blind so I have no choice but to stumble along. I hope it's Kanne leading me somewhere and not some stranger again like this morning.

The plugs in my pussy and ass inflate and deflate with every step I take. Every second I get more and more horny but I can't do anything about it. It drives me absolutely insane.

“Mm ie est, eazzzz” I try to indicate to her that I need a rest. But whoever leads me around either ignores me or doesn’t hear.

I shuffle forward in my darkness.

“Careful, small steps!” I hear her voice instruct me and I moan and my tremble from relief that it's Kanne.

I take a small step and suddenly I scoot forward, almost losing my balance. I think we’re on an escalator going up.

“Watch it… Almost… Small step, almost… NOW!” comes the next instruction, and I stumble off the escalator onto solid ground at the top. Her firm grip on my arm guides me to a new area.

When we finally stop moving she tells me to stay. It's a bit quieter here, there is less music.

I’m out of breath from the brisk short-ish walk and my nerves are shot, the escalator was the final straw. Barely being able to breathe through my nose is not helping one bit. I try to stand on my toes so the plugs do not inflate too much, but it’s no use and every few seconds I slowly sink to a flat-footed position filling myself up.

I groan in discomfort.

“Just respond to the nearest voice and strike a pose. It's a photoshoot. I’ll be nearby.” Is her final instruction and the grip on my arm disappears.

“Ah oo ou an me to ooh” (*What do you want me to do?) I don't understand and groan but even if anyone could hear me, nobody would recognize anything I say.

A man shouts something in Japanese from my left, maybe from a few meters away.

I turn to the voice and cameras click.

Someone else calls out from behind me and I clumsily turn around. I have no idea what I'm doing but bend through my knees a tiny bit and touch what I think is my chin.

Cameras constantly click around me.

People shout at me every few seconds and I squirm into dozens of poses and I have no idea who’s telling me what, what they want, or even what I'm doing right now.

I imagine that I’m in the middle of the convention hall, just posing in public for pictures of my cosplay.

While stupidly 'doing my thing' I wonder why I agreed to going to the event like this. But I guess I didn't really agree to anything…

After about 20 minutes Kanne's voice shouts something very close to me and I hear a quiet click and I'm tugged along on the leash. Apparently that had been removed at some point.

"Very good Little Haru. Nice nice nice!" Kanne praises me, she sounds very pleased.

I follow the leash for a while and bump into her as she stops and starts talking to someone. A male voice. The boyfriend, I think, sounds upbeat as he makes an agreeable sound.

“Ok Taylor. Time for the big surprise I promised you." Kanne announces. "I really had fun with you as my doll. We really should do that more."

The hell we should! I think. I'm going to give her a piece of my mind when I get out of this.

"I’m going to the AirBnB now with my boyfriend, once I find him… I'll leave you with Kyon here, he's a big fan.” Kanne says.

I freeze on the spot.

“I told him it's your first time. So that you’re very nervous. He doesn’t speak much English, you know.” An unseen smile. Then she whispers near my ear, "Just follow his lead. He's just going to play with little Haru!"

I jerk my head towards her voice and grasp in that direction catching Kanne in my arms. I whine and moan, I don't want this. But I'm immediately out of breath and I'm forced to let go so I can bend over and lean on my knees, panting and wheezing trying to catch air.

Kanne takes this as me hugging her and says her goodbye, “Well, I'm off. Have fun. Cya!”

I don't know what 'playing with Haru' means but I expect it's nothing good or decent.

3 - Duped

I struggle and resist the whole way as I'm pulled along. It's a weak effort though as I'm extremely horny and out of breath with every tug and pull.

Unknown to me Kanne had warned Kyon that I'm a clumsy and nervous doll while on the leash and blind, so some struggling is to be expected.

I’m placed into a car and a seatbelt is put on me. I try punching the person strapping me in but a strong hand grabs my wrist and wraps the seatbelt around it or something. Suddenly I can’t move much anymore.

I hear my phone's ringtone, how did that get here?

“Hear, you phone. Kanne… say. Have fun… She come… for you… Toomowwow!” a man tells me in broken English. "We play… an take, photo!" the voice then gleefully announces.

I sit frozen for a second and then wildly shake my head. What the fuck! She actually gave me away for the night? I scream into my gag making me gag and choke and I immediately run out of breath and damn near pass out in my blind panic.

I kick my legs but there is no escape.

Meanwhile the car starts driving, it is stop and go in traffic and I struggle all the way. But either nobody sees me or nobody cares. I get so worked up that I gurgle and choke and my world goes black as I pass out.

When I wake up I'm lying on my stomach. I can't feel a thing because of the skin suit but somehow I sense that I'm on a floor, maybe there is carpet or some rug below me?

I groan and squirm and when there is a sound near my feet I give a firm kick in that direction and hit something. With a loud 'oof' I hear a man stumble back and crash into a door or wall.

Moments later a hand closes around my throat and squeezes. “Bee nice…” says a voice near me.

I gurgle and breathe deeply when the hand releases my throat. And I decide to play along until I can see something, or can use my hands, and then I’ll escape.

Next the hand tugs at something on the front of my mask and air floods into my throat. Flabbergasted at this I groan and splutter. The gag is hollow? Geez, Kanne is a massive bitch.

“Hear, drink.” Something is poured down my throat.

I taste nothing of this because of the gag but getting a drink after, what? A day? Yes please! I greedily glug the drink down and I feel it peps me up so much that I get a buzz, as if I drank three energy drinks in one go.

Getting a drink is nice, but I feel more stupid and helpless than ever. I can't even swallow or taste. He could've poured pee or coca cola down my throat and I wouldn’t know the difference.

My brain hates everything that's happening to me. But my body betrays me again and kinda enjoys this humiliating treatment. I squeeze my thighs together on the plugs and almost wish he would just fuck me and get it over with.

“Open!” the man says.

And a penis is pushed through the mouth hole. Or I think that's a penis. I can't feel or see a thing of-course.

I can do little to prevent him as he squeezes his penis into my mouth. But is it my mouth really? Other than the pressure of his member I feel nothing.

Fuck that… I refuse to cooperate and shake my head. ‘MMphing’ wildly.

He gives a firm tap on my masked head and pushes again.

“Open!” He demands, but gives up a few seconds later.

“Uhhh uhmm uhhhh!” I croak through the mask. Unable to form words. I’m desperate to see and ask questions. Almost as desperate as my need to orgasm. God I’m so fucking horny.

“You… have… problem?” The man sounds worried.

I furiously nod and he fidgets with the mask and it pops open, fresh air touches my sweaty face.

He flips the face part up and the gag just keeps coming and coming and coming.

It's almost ten inches long. Strings of drool and slime come up and I retch and choke as the sliding sensation screws with my arousal.

“Fucking hell that feels good…” I gasp with relief as it leaves my mouth. My stretched throat feels so weird now that it's empty and I take deep heaving breaths for the first time in ten hours.

Hell yea! Things are finally looking up for me!

He stares at me and I look up at the kind face of a young man. This is no kidnapper or rapist I instinctively know. Just some loser who wants to fuck anime girls.

He looks puzzled at me and the gag. Clearly he didn't know about it. He probably wonders what’s going on. Why his doll won’t play. The guy asks things in Japanese but I don’t know what he’s saying. So I just stare at him.

“Use the translate, on the phone.” I tell him. “Trans… late. Phone!”

He gets it after a few attempts and looks for my phone. Rummaging through my suitcase. Apparently Kanne had given him all my stuff.

“What code?”

“0 4 1 9 0 4,” I tell him. Yes, that’s my birthday… I’m so smart.

He punches in the code and unlocks the phone. I’m desperate to communicate with him and clear up whatever is going on.

“Now?”

I scoot forward and poke my tongue at the Google translate app.

“That!”

He opens the app and gets what we’re doing.

The Google voice reads, ‘Why won’t you play?’

He touches the microphone icon so I can reply, “I don’t want to play, where is Kanne?”

He types in the app, ‘You’re not my girlfriend?’

I listen to the voice and stare at him in disbelief. “No of-course not! Let me go!” I shout at him.

He touches the microphone button and I have to repeat myself three times before the app gets the message.

I’m so angry. Who the fuck does Kanne think that she is, whoring me out to some random nerd? God fucking dammit.

The young man is taken aback and sits for a moment, stumped that things do not go according to plan. He looks saddened and I feel sorry for him.

“Can you let me go? Please?” I ask him, holding up my stumpy hands.

“Hai hai!” (yes yes!) He comes back to reality and with a slight bow he starts freeing me.

See? Not a kidnapper or rapist. I knew it!

An hour later I have showered and I’m sitting in his living room wearing the brown and black Kimono he gave me. I’m naked underneath. The soft fabric feels so nice on my skin. I really like it and I want one for at home.

I never want to wear a skinsuit for that long, or ever, again. What a mess when I peeled it from my body.

Ewww!

In the shower cabin I finally was able to pull the plugs out and I had my orgasm. Right there in the bathroom of a man I don’t know.

The sensation of relief as the anal plug came out, heavenly! Oh my god it felt so good to finally get rid of that fucking thing. I've never done anal. And when the vaginal one fell out and landed on the floor with a wet splat, I couldn’t control myself and fingered myself there and then.

When my fingers touched my lips my legs turned into jelly and I slid down the wall on my shoulder into a quivering mess as I furiously fingered myself. I’m sure he heard my moaning and the squeal as I came loudly 30 seconds later. But I didn't care at that moment.

Catching my breath I turned on the water and while showering I fingered myself again and again while squeezing my breasts in a bit more controlled manner. But fucking hell it felt good to finally have some kind of control over myself again.

We sit across from each other in his living room. I stare shyly at the table between us. Realization of my obscene orgasm had hit me as soon as I slid open the bathroom door and seeing his curious face. I have a million questions, but the language barrier is huge.

“You… What you… name?” he asks me.

“I’m Taylor,” I introduce myself. “And you?”

“My name… Kyon Nakano!” he announces with fervor, as if that's something to be proud of.

I smile at how he says it, it’s kinda cute.

“You… Very be-uutifool,” he praises me, gesturing at my cheeks which I think means he likes my freckles.

“Thanks I guess,” I quietly say.

Actually I don’t have a million questions and just want to sleep for now. I’m very tired. What a fucking shitshow…

“You really don’t speak English? But can you understand my words?” I ask.

He nods with a smile.

“Is there a hotel nearby? I really want to sleep…” I ask him. I make a sleeping signal with my hands.

He nods.

“Can you take me to it?”

He nods again.

“You have no idea what I’m saying do you?”

And when he nods again, I think again what a shitshow this is. I sigh and wonder how people can survive without speaking English.

“Doofus…” I mumble. And I get up and head to the bathroom to get dressed in my own clothes. I'll find my own way.

When I get out ten minutes later he’s waiting at the door and I almost bump into him.

“Seep… hear.. OK?”

“Seep? What?” I wonder what he means.

“I find… fiend… She speek inglish… he come… toomoro.”

I sigh and look at him, “Look, Kyon? You’ve been very kind to me. I really appreciate that. But I want to leave now.”

I point at what I think is the front door.

“Hai hai! Come. Seep!”

He hurries to the door and slides it open while I follow him, revealing a neat bedroom.

“This is my room? I can stay here?” I ask him.

“Hai hai!” He nods.

I sigh, “Fine then, thanks. And we will talk tomorrow?”

“Hai hai!” He agrees.

I give up, there is no talking to this man and I step inside. As I turn around to wish him goodnight he’s stepping forward just as I smack the door closed. Not finding a lock I give up on privacy and strip to my underwear and crawl in bed.

I’m asleep moments later.

The next morning I’m woken with a hand on my shoulder, gently shaking it.

“Teelor-chan, friend she is… hear.”

I groan, “What do you want! Go away!” I hate the world right now, especially Japan, and want to sleep for at least a few hours longer.

The hand disappears and I’m left alone.

Then I remember where I am and peek over the bedsheets into the room but it’s empty. I'll make my escape before more things can go wrong. Coming out of bed I quickly get dressed and sneak into the bathroom.

I’ve had enough of this shit. I don’t want to see anyone and I’m going back to Houston as soon as possible.

“Hi, you’re finally awake!” A new voice calls out after me.

When I poke my head out the bathroom door I see a new man, also with a kind face. He looks like Kyon, but unlike Kyon he's no doofus, he looks very manly and confident.

“Hey…” I say, lost for words as he gazes upon me. And pull my head inside and go to the toilet. Wow! Cuuuute! I think.

When I come out Kyon and the new guy are waiting for me.

“Hello.” He greets me with an almost American accent.

“Oh! Finally someone who speaks a proper language.” I call out. “Fucking hell…”

Two days of Japanese and frustrations sure took their toll on me.

Both men frown at me and Kyon says something.

“Kyon thinks you’re very rude.” The new man smirks. “I told him that’s how Americans are.”

“Yea well sorry if I’m not miss supernice. Geez! And who are you?”

Fuck Kyon and his opinions…

“I’m Kenji Nakano. His older brother.” Kenji introduces himself.

“Oh right, Hello Kenji. I’m Taylor.” I introduce myself. Looking at him arouses me but I try to keep my cool.

“Kyon said he found a cosplay girlfriend from America. But then it wasn’t to be?”

I stare at him.

“Then he tells me you took his bedroom and you made him sleep on the floor. And I think…’What the hell is going on?’”

He laughs at me as if it’s all a big joke.

Yeah? Fuck you too… I think.

I take a deep breath. “I was tricked into wearing a cosplay outfit and Kyon here took me from Tokyo to wherever the fuck we are now.”

I summarize yesterday’s events.

“Tricked? He took you?” Kenji looks puzzled.

I start to explain, “I’m here visiting my ‘friend’,” I airquote friend. “She made me wear that ridiculous outfit with dildos and gags and whatnot. I couldn’t see or talk all day and night. She ignored me all day while leading me around on a leash or something and then this nerd here wants me to suck his dick.”

I take a deep breath and ramble on.

“When he finally figures out I don’t want it and that I’m not some kind of slut he can have… And you know what? Forget it. I just want to get the hell out of here.”

Kenji frowns at me.

“But he also let you go, so can you be a little nicer?” He tells me.

“NO I CAN’T! I’M LEAVING, WHERE IS THE FUCKING EXIT!” I shout into the house.

I barge into the bedroom and grab my stuff and head for a random door. Sliding it open I see a kitchen and I smack it shut. The next door I try leads onto a hallway and there is a front-door kind of door on the other end. I storm through the room and end up on the street and realize I’m very very hungry.

I don’t even know what a restaurant looks like in this country. On a nearby bench I sit down and cry for a few minutes.

Kenji has followed me and sits down next to me on the other end of the bench but says nothing. When I finally calm down and look around I see him look at me.

“I’m so sorry,” I tell him through my tears. “It's just that I came here to meet my best friend and see anime. But everything, literally everything, keeps going wrong.”

“I get it…” He smiles at me. But his eyes look dead serious.

“We’re in Shizuoka, three hours from Tokyo. You can take a train. Or you can come with me.” He continues. His gaze pierces into my soul.

When I say nothing and just stare at him and slowly nod, Kenji takes the lead and grabs my suitcase and pulls me to my feet. We walk hand in hand towards Kyon’s apartment. Pass it and on the next road crossing he looks me in the eyes again. His intense stare bores right through me.

I don't know what comes over me and I lose myself in his gaze. He stares deep into my being for a few seconds and I wanton look back, unable to look away.

“I see…" He decides. "Come with me, I want to show you something."

He grabs my hand.

“Kenji… I…” I can only mumble. His touch is so gentle. His decision to help me, so kind. Or I hope he's helping me.

We walk the ten minutes to his house, it's one of those traditional wooden houses with paper sliding panels for walls. I saw these houses a million times in anime shows. I think it's beautiful, so different from American houses. When you look closer you'd notice this is actually a modern house built from bricks. But it looks cool. I sheepishly follow Kenji as he pulls me along by my hand.

When the door closes behind us I can’t resist him any longer and press a kiss on his cheek.

When he kisses me back we hug and our arms and fingers entangle as he walks me backwards straight into his bedroom. There is no bed in there, just a traditional floor mattress. I think I know that this is called a futon. Before I know it my shirt is gone, and his pants come off.

We just breathe and gasp as we hurriedly get naked and he plunges into my wet vagina.

“Ohhh fuuuuuck! Yesssss!” I press my hand across my mouth and moan into it with wide eyes. He is so decisive and firm. It's amazing!

Kenji is a silent lover and only grunts as he thrusts into me with a determined look on his face. I’m not so subtle and moan and whine and claw with my hands at him and the floor as he owns me completely.

What feels like a mere couple of minutes is actually close to an hour and when he finishes inside of me I can't contain myself any longer and orgasm so strongly that it feels as if he squeezes my throat shut and I struggle for air, kicking my legs and flailing my arms.

“Fuck!” I gasp as I finally calm down. We lie next to each other on the floor.

“I own you now Taylor.” I hear his whisper.

I’m so out of it I just stupidly agree and mumble, “Whatever you say…”

4 - Becoming Chijo

“Kenji?!” I call out to him. “How much longer, Kenji?”

I hang naked from the ceiling. A rope ties my ankles together with several loose loops. He had strung me upside down from a ceiling beam, I'm completely helpless. An egg vibrator hums inside me, the wire sneaking out from between my vagina lips leads to a remote controller. He wrapped the length of the wire around my thigh to tie the controller into place. My arms helplessly hang under me, I can almost touch the floor.

I don’t really know how long I’ve been here. The room is dimly lit and I haven’t seen a clock or daylight since entering his house. I'm so helpless and my body loves it. My mind is a bit more cautious.

Logically it has to be night. After our sex we ate some rice and I think beef slices in a dark sauce. He then fed me Sake until I felt all warm and fuzzy and before I realized it I agreed to him showing me the ‘something’ he mentioned on the street and soon after I was hanging upside down as I am now.

It's probably nearing midnight? But really I'm not sure.

“Kenjiiii please! Let me cuhuhuuum!” I cry out into the house. “Please please please Kenjiiiiii I'll do anything!”

When there is no answer I contort myself trying to get off on that fucking vibrator that’s in me. But it’s on a low hum, so I have little hope of ever orgasming from this frustrating thing.

Not until Kenji allows it…

I reflect on my current situation as things just keep getting worse and worse. Kanne probably would have come get me by now and let me go. Laughing at my expense for having to suck off some guy. But now? Nobody in the world except my captor knows I'm here. I know I'm here, but I don't know where ‘here’ is. Some city away from Tokyo, Shusuka or whatever? I don't remember.

In my head I know I should get out of here as fast as possible, back to safe America where things make sense. But my body wants to stay with Kenji and do bondage.

I've never been tied up. But I've seen this in Japanese porn… Shibari it’s called or something?

It always fascinated me.

I don't really care if I know Kenji or not at this point. His gaze compels me, every time he looks at me I lose myself.

Taylor, you're a big fucking slutty dumbo… Get a hold of yourself and get out of here! I curse myself.

I hang for a little while more when Kenji finally shows himself. I moan at seeing him.

"Pleaheheease let me cuhuhuuuum Kenjiii. Anything you want, but puleaseeee give me that!" I beg him. God I sound like a pathetic whore.

"So Taylor," He ignores my plea, as he loosens the rope that holds me up and slowly lowers me to the ground. "Are you enjoying yourself yet?" He looks at me with a domineering gaze. "Or are you a weak woman?" His voice thunders through the room. It makes me feel small and insignificant.

"I… Ehhh. Weak? What?" I gasp as I lie contorted on the floor, splayed out. I reach for my crotch but he kicks my hands away.

"No Taylor, answer me!" He commands me. His stern eyes prevent me from speaking though.

Kenji smirks at me and probes for a response via another way. "Nod if you want more. Move your left arm if you're done."

I stare at him wide eyed and nod very slowly. God I'm under his spell, the way he intimidates me. It's wildly exciting.

He squats next to my head and slaps me on both cheeks with his right hand.

"Taylor! Focus! Hey!" His voice rumbles at me and he slaps me a few more times until I respond. I guess he wants me to make a conscious decision. How cute of him.

I look startled at him and to the ceiling as I land back on earth, somewhat. Kenji sits down now and pulls me onto his lap. Holding me like I'm some kind of teddy bear as he strokes my cheek with the tips of his fingers and his other hand gently stroking my vagina.

I quiver and moan, but can't utter a word.

"Taylor, hey!" He gently says, stepping out of his domineering role.

"Kenjiiii, please. Let, cum, me." I softly whisper. Oh that terrible vibrator. I love and hate it.

He twists the knob on my thigh, turning it off, and I visibly relax and let out a sigh. He strokes my face and pays me no mind for a few minutes while tears run down my cheek. I want to orgasm so badly but I can't touch myself. He forbade it. His power over me is so strong he only had to tell me once by kicking my hands away.

After seven minutes he inquires again.

"Taylor. Are you ready to be mine?" His voice rumbles from deep in his chest.

"I, what…? What does that mean?" I stumble over my words.

"More of what you just experienced. Zero control over yourself until I decide that you deserve to get it back." He states with his deep voice.

"I want to, but I have to get home…" I whisper, barely audible.

"When?"

"I don't know. Less than two weeks."

He sits me upright and I idly look at the ground in front of me. Uncaring what happens next as long as he makes me feel good and gives me his twisted flavor of pleasure. In whatever form.

He ties a simple body harness around me starting with a loop around my neck and crisscrossing ropes around my breasts and midriff. It's a rough rope and it chafes my skin. I moan and whimper as he pulls a double rope through my vagina and lets a knot rest on my clitoris. He then ties my arms to my sides and lower arms parallel across my back. My wrists are just above the small of my back.

He fidgets with the leftover rope winding it up along a rope that goes up my spine and finishes it with a knot between my shoulder blades.

He pulls me to my feet using the rope between my shoulder blades as a handle. The loose loops around my ankles slip over my feet and I step out of them. He manhandles me to another room, showing me myself in front of a tall mirror. He holds me in place one hand and his other hand firmly on my throat. He grins over my shoulder.

"Last chance Taylor."

I stare at my naked bound body. Trying to stand on my trembling legs and constantly adjust my feet below me but I can't find my footing for some reason. It makes no difference really. His iron grip on my body holds me in place even if I wouldn't have legs. I see the most erotic image before me and barely recognize myself. My messy hair, unfocused eyes, mouth half open. My tits circled by ropes. The bulge of my skin where the ropes press into my sides.

Fuck this is exciting, and I've never been more horny. Kenji could choke me out while punching me in my stomach and I would thank him for the privilege.

I nod and whisper, "Do it…"

This seals my fate, and he has his plaything.

“You’re Chijo! Taylor is not here anymore.” He renames me. He makes a dismissive gesture with the hand that was on my throat, as if he shoves Taylor out of the door.

And I just stupidly smile and nod, infatuated with the feeling he gives me as he makes me look at myself. Chijo sounds cute, right? I am so completely engrossed in what is happening to me. I think nothing of it.

He lets go of me and I sink to the floor.

I flex my arms but can not move them one inch. With a couple of loops of rope and a simple knot they're completely useless. All I can do is make fists with my hands and stretch my fingers. I know every knot that controls me is just four inches above my hands. It'd be so easy to reach it if my hands weren't stuck. Yet I have zero control over anything. All I can do now is sit and stare longingly at his figure towering over me.

It's been several hours. He has extended the body harness to bind my legs together as well. And I look like I'm wrapped in a net, with many feet of rope criss crossing my legs. Knotted or twisted together whenever two ropes cross. He pulled everything rather tight, but not uncomfortably so. I feel the coarse rope all over my body and whimper when he strokes my cheek and stares into my eyes. Without a word he had dragged me back to the bedroom. Then he took off the simple Kimono he had been wearing and went to sleep.

That night I sleep next to him in my bondage. I get no mattress or blanket. I'm just on the floor, abandoned like his kimono, several feet away from him.

Unable to sleep at first I try flexing my hips to try and get off on the crotch rope, ever since the vibrating egg turned on I've been extremely horny but I haven't been able to cum. With the egg gone I have to make do with the crotch rope, but I can't move enough to get off on it. It frustrates me immensely. With Kenji 'gone' his influence over me wanes slightly and I return to reality and consider the gravity of my life's choices over the last 18 or so hours.

I can't wrap my head around how unbelievably reckless I have been. But also I can't wrap my head around how strong my arousal is from what has been happening to me. I don't recognize my behavior at all anymore and am embarrassed to think that I might turn into a wanton whore instead of being the shy girl I always considered myself to be.

But it's not really that. The feeling of helplessness and the immense sense of arousal and relief it gives me when he does these things to me. Is this love? Is that what I’m feeling for this man? It's more akin to masochism maybe?

I don't know.

I know nothing anymore. Especially not who I am, or when I will be free again. Kenji had taken possession of me knowing I have to go home at some point. But he didn't really ask when. Nor did he tell me if he'd ever let me go at all.

After hours of quiet moans and attempted masturbation mixed with worries ruining my arousal I finally fall into a fitful sleep.

5 - Chijo is a slut

The next morning Kenji had grumbled that he didn’t sleep well because of me and had looped a rope around the rope between my shoulder blades and hoisted me into the rafters until my feet were above his head.

I hadn't quite gotten what he said as I was still figuring out why I couldn't move and now I don't fully understand why I'm swaying back and forth.

"Kenji?"

"Shut up Chijo!" He grumbles as he stands under me with a steaming cup of coffee.

Fully awake now I look down on him and wonder why he looks so angry. Taking a big swig from his mug he looks up at me one last time and walks out of the bedroom. I don't see him for the rest of the day.

Every once in a while I would call out to him. But the house remains eerily quiet. I'm starting to think he left for work or something. With nothing to do all day but endure my bondage I thought it is a terrible experience, boring too. Yes, actually it's worse than what Kanne did to me. At least with her I knew there had to be an end to the madness, when the convention would end for example. But this? I have no idea.

I'm so bored, and scared. And I still didn't orgasm.

I feel absolutely miserable when he finally gets home. I had decided hours ago that I want out and go home. Kenji lets me down and apologizes, “I was in a bad mood this morning, Chijo. I’m sorry.”

I sniffle and sob as he removes the bondage from my legs. But the body harness stays in place.

“Fucking bastard! I want to go home. Let me out.” I weakly sniffle at him.

He ignores my demand and makes dinner. Ramen with beef and noodles. He feeds me slices of beef and leafy greens from a large bowl. When I'm made to slurp the soup I can't help but cough and splutter and make a mess.

Kenji doesn't seem to care. He silently cleans up the mess on the floor and wipes down my body. When we’re done with dinner he increases my bondage again. I protest and ask to be let go, but he ignores me.

This will be my first hogtie. Again a not so comfortable tie with coarse rope, but who am I to refuse my new master. Clearly I'm not going home anytime soon. He doubles my legs and ties each in place. My heels press into my butt. When he's done I’m left to my own devices while he goes about his evening.

I hear the TV in the other room, he does the dishes, some walking around. I hear the shower. I feel lonely and ignored throughout. This is so different from yesterday. I don't understand. I still didn't orgasm, and my horny mood is thoroughly ruined. As wanton and engrossed as I was yesterday. I'm firmly in the unwilling corner today.

I wallow in my misery and pity myself. What the fuck Taylor?! I curse myself.

That night when he finally comes into the bedroom again he starts preparing something with a rope over the ceiling beam.

“Kenji? Can we talk?” I repeatedly ask him. "Helloooo? Please say something."

“No. Be quiet.” He denies me and worms the rope under another that sits on the small of my back. I touch his hands with my fingers, it’s electrifying. He then gets up and grunts as he pulls on the rope hanging from the ceiling and I lift off the floor. He hoists me up so my head is at about chest height.

The floating sensation is very exciting, but it's also scary and I wonder how long he’ll keep me like this. I also remind myself that I want to go home. But my woes are quickly forgotten as he steps in front of me and grabs my hips and fucks me silly for the next half hour. I dangle helplessly as he roughly owns me.

I finally have my orgasm. All the built up arousal that has been simmering inside me for the last 24 hours instantly activated when his penis enters me. My wanton lust is growing to immense heights again. Combine that with all my misery, worries and angry escape thoughts and that energy rolls into my orgasm as well. I scream so loud and orgasm so hard that I almost black out.

When he’s done he grunts and ejaculates inside me and leaves me hanging. Giving me a firm shove and I sway back and forth several meters across the room.

I squeal in fear as I fly through the room spinning left and right as the rope twists and unwinds.

When the first scare wears off I try to come to terms with what just happened. Unsure if this is what my life looks like from now on. The whole position is very exciting. The helpless feeling is great. But his distant demeanor and him treating me like a thing is actually not very sexy.

I sigh deeply.

When he comes back after a while he is freshly shaven and I think he showered again. Wearing just underwear, he lowers me to the floor and releases my legs.

I luxuriously stretch them with a groan and blood finally flows freely.

“Kenji? My arms too please.” I ask him, making fists behind my back and stretching my fingers.

But he says nothing and instead slips the egg vibrator inside of me and sticks the remote under one of the ropes holding my arm in place.

He then unties me from the ceiling rope and ties my ankles together.

“Kenji, please. We need to talk.” I meekly try to get his attention. “Can you talk to me?”

“Shut up Chijo or I’ll gag you.”

I groan, "What you're doing. Is this Shibari? Or kin-eh-baki?"

"Kinbaku…" he corrects me. "This is a form of Shibari bondage yes."

I love it. But I hate it too.

Then comes my next question, “What does Chijo mean?”

“It means slut.” He tells me.

“What? Why?”

“That’s what you are. My foreigner Chijo.” He tells me with a sly smile. He then reaches for the remote, twisting the knob. The vibrating egg turns on to an infuriating low hum.

I moan and squirm in my bondage and grind my crotch on the floor trying to get off.

“I’m not a slut Kenji. Let me go please? I want to go home. This is not what we agreed to.” I continue talking.

Not what we agreed to? Yes, I sincerely believe he lied to me when I say this.

Kenji's gaze pierces my soul as he says, "Think about what you agreed to Chijo."

I do, he had told me that he would give me zero control until he decided I could have it back. Wait what? That's exactly what he's doing. I have no control, he never promised to be kind to me, or considerate, or even that I would get pleasure from it.

"Oh my fucking god, what did I dooooo?" I quietly groan at my immense stupidity. Was I so high on arousal that I completely mistook his intent? I truly get very depressed at the realization of how unbelievably stupid I am. My depressed mood is only slightly lessened by the vibrator quietly humming inside me.

Kenji meanwhile smiles at me seeing my realization, but he says nothing and leaves the room.

“Kenji??? Please please stop this!” I call after him but he’s not listening.

Moments later he's back and I ask again, “Kenji, talk to me. How much longer are you keeping me?”

I keep looking for answers and clarifications but in the end he forces three pairs of my panties into my mouth and wraps the sash of a kimono around the lower half of my face to keep my gag in place and he goes to sleep next to me.

I don't sleep at all that night, constantly aroused by the vibrator until it runs out of batteries. But more-so because I can't escape the fact that I truly had him enslave me thinking he'd love me.

I hate myself…

When he finally takes out the gag the next morning I don't talk anymore. I've had all night to get worked up over what the rest of my life will look like, and I'm done talking to this guy. He can do whatever the hell he wants and hopefully he'll let me go some day. I'm done with this.

Or am I?

I still get horny from his touch. When he gazes at me it makes me feel small and obedient. My body keeps betraying my mind.

Yes, I must be a masochist. I'm sure of it now.

He removes all bondage except for the rope harness. My arms haven't moved from my body for two days now and feel numb and weak. I'm not sure what's up with that. When I look down at my upper arms they look fine and normal, safe for the ropes around them.

I'm apparently expertly tied in ways that completely restrain me, yet do not restrict my blood or pinch anything. I choose to ignore it for now.

He decides to hang me from the ceiling beam again. But this time he lifts me all the way up so that my head uncomfortably bumps into the beam and my shoulder blades touch the beam from below. Just as I think he's going to leave me like this he enters the room with a folding ladder and climbs up. He hoists my ankles up as well and ties them tightly to the beam. Another rope goes around my knees strapping them to the beam. And finally one more rope more or less around my crotch and hips.

He then works a magic wand vibrator under the ropes and rests the head against the knot in my crotch rope. The power cord dangles down to the ground.

I have a vague idea of what he's setting up for me. I've seen these vibrator things on Pornhub. I saw how it makes women writhe and scream. Nothing he does bodes well for poor me.

When I groan and let my head dangle down he presses a kiss on my forehead and wraps a final rope around it, tying my head to the beam as well.

He puts the ladder away and while he's gone I wiggle my body as I hang in my insane bondage. Other than wiggle against the beam I can't make any meaningful movement. At least when he hung from it the day before I could bend my legs. But now… I can't even turn my head.

I estimate I am at-least 16 feet from the floor, way up between the rafters of the roof. And all I can do is stare straight down at the floor. I let out an exasperated sigh.

Kenji enters the room again with an extension cord and connects it to the vibrator.

He looks up at me holding the wall plug and grins.

"Chijo! I want you to count how many orgasms you have today. Can you do that simple task?"

"I want to go home!" I sob.

"You can go home when I let you free!" He smiles kindly at me.

There is visible admiration in his eyes. I notice, surely he cares for me. Right? Seeing the look in his eyes fans the flames in me and I love him back. Stupid masochist Taylor, in love with a stranger.

"But do you have to be so mean and distant to me? Why can't we have fun together?" I whine. I really want to find actual pleasure in all of this.

Kenji frowns as if he comes to a sad realization, and says, "I'll think about that today. Give me a good answer tonight and I'll give you a choice."

My eyes go wide. "A choice? What choice?" Then the gravity of his words smack me in the face. "NO! No no no no no! Please no. Not the vibrator all day, pleaaaase! Kenji!" I follow how he bends down and plugs in the magic wand. Anticipating my torture I start crying and shriek as the magic wand comes to life on medium strength.

I shudder and twitch as he leaves the room.

"KENJIIIIIII! KENJI PLEASE COME BACK! DON'T LEAVE ME COME BAHAHAAACK!" I scream my lungs out of my body, but he ignores me and leaves the house.

Kenji struggles with her words all day. He wants to tell Taylor that he's about to get a divorce. That he’s going to abandon his wife. That this house is his refuge from his family. But until he finishes up with them, he can't attach himself to Taylor. If only she had fallen into his lap six months later…

Meanwhile in the home I writhe in my bonds and have my first orgasm after about 15 minutes. Of-course the stimulation doesn't stop so it's drawn out and I shudder and moan as the orgasms keep coming and coming. I completely forget to count.

Two hours later the magic wand finally stops. I guess I've had six real orgasms? Several extended ones, but really, I can't tell them apart. So really one actual orgasm, the first. And the rest was just a long painful drawn out blur of misery. I had let go of my pee and it clattered down onto the floor mats. Now my vagina is just dripping from arousal, I'm making quite the mess below me.

That evening Kenji comes home and the house remains dark. But I don't care. I'm ready to drop down to the floor and have the earth swallow me.

Kenji sets up a lantern in the bedroom and smelling my piss he cleans the floor. He again doesn't seem to care about the mess I make. When he's finally done he sets out to release me. I'm carefully let down and he removes all ropes, but again leaves the body harness in place. I also remain attached to the roof, but very loosely so. He holds me in his arms.

"Chijo, the power is out. How many orgasms?" he whispers at me.

"Stop calling me a slut Kenji… Please?" I whisper pathetically at him.

"How many?" He asks again. Ignoring my request.

"I don't know, six at least and then the thing stopped."

This seems to satisfy Kenji and he nods.

"I thought about your words this morning." He kindly whispers into my ear.

"I don't care… Please let me free. I want to go hooooome." I cry in his arms but moan through my tears as he gently strokes my vagina.

"Would you believe it if I say I have good reason to keep my distance from you emotionally?" He asks. He sounds vulnerable. Nothing like the silent strict man he has been so far.

I crane my head up and look at him. He stares into the distance while stroking my body.

"No!" I firmly say.

"Believe me I do. I wish it would be different. But I'll make you a deal, Chijo." He offers with a serious face.

"What deal? My choice?" I wonder, sniffling.

A moment later I yawn. I'm so tired. I want to sleep in a bed and hide under the blankets. Bury myself in pillows.

6 - Chijo is a masochist

Kenji nods at me and gives me my choice. He caresses my face when he lays out his deal.

"There is something that I've always wanted to do to a woman, you're perfect for it. You're free when we're done." He vaguely explains and pushes me to a sitting position as my body flexes against the body harness. He gets up and I fall back down and lay splayed out on the floor staring at the ceiling.

"But my visa… I have to go." My tired mind only worries for my escape.

"Just this one thing." Kenji offers again with a little more force in his voice.

I can't refuse him, and besides, getting released sounds good.

"Yeah ok. Whatever… Just so that you let me go. You'll let me go right?" I naively agree to his unknown offer. It'll just be more bondage anyway.

He smiles at me and presses a kiss on my lips while holding my head in his hands. His first real affection since we had sex.

"You're wonderful Chijo. Now, reach up with your left hand and feel for the loop."

I groan as I try to comply. I can barely feel my hands, but I find a loop.

"Pull it with all your might."

I pull on the rope and after some initial friction the loop gets bigger and the ropes on my arms fall away. I look stumped but don't move my arms. I'm so used to having them tied to my back by now. I realize that I don't really want to move them.

Kenji gently unfolds my arms and rests my right hand on my stomach, my left arm drops down to the floor, "If only you knew right?"

I nod, feeling small in his arms. Unsure of what's happening. I had wanted to leave for the last three days. But now that I'm pretty much free I realize that I am unable to make a move. Unwilling rather.

"Don't run away Chijo, remember our deal. You're not free." His gaze paralyzes me.

"Yes Kenji." I submissively mumble.

"Are you sure you agree to do that one thing for me?"

I nod slowly, powerless to refuse him, just like that first day.

"Hold your hands together in front." He quietly tells me.

I obey and I watch him tie them together.

"Kenji… What are you doing?"

"Shh, relax Chijo." He soothes me.

I'm so entranced with my situation that I don't even think to ask what 'his thing' is.

Kenji roughly rolls me over and unwinds the rope from between my shoulder blades, he then pulls on another knot. Immediately the rope harness around my torso loosens and falls apart as he tugs at the ropes. That feels so weird, as if my body is pulsing and expanding. I stare down over my torso and see the many rope marks. Over the last three or four days the ropes have embedded into my skin and now that they're gone, dozens of purple lines and deep indents show what a perverted dumbass I've been.

It's arousing and fascinating. My upper arms have deep indentations too. I moan at the sight.

"You're beautiful Chijo." He praises me.

I nod in slow motion again and I get excited seeing my rope marks. I feel that each purple line represents a tiny piece of my being.

"All marked, excited and broken. All… mine…" He lets that last bit hang in the air.

Before I can deny his claim he yanks on the rope and my arms raise up. I don't even have to stand up and cooperate. He effortlessly pulls me upright and to my feet. Kenji keeps pulling on the rope until I'm standing on my tip-toes. I step around trying to find my balance but it's very difficult.

"Now, the thing I want to do to you, my beautiful Chijo, the thing that will transform you… It's pleasure through pain." Kenji whispers in my ear from behind.

I whimper at the thought, a knot forms in my throat, so tight that I can't speak.

"But before you deserve to get pleasure, I have to hurt you." He continues.

"No… Please. No pain." I whisper with a fear filled voice.

"Ma-so-chist…" He whispers

I whimper again, louder. He has figured me out. Maybe even more so than I dare to admit to myself.

"I knew it when I took your hand at the bus stop." He tells her.

See? I idly think to myself.

"Your friend Kanne probably knows what you are as well." He taunts me.

I cringe at hearing her name, I had forgotten all about the traitorous bitch. But I know he's probably right. She effortlessly made me comply as well.

"I bet the stewardess on the plane saw who you are as well…" Kenji teases me.

"No…" I gasp. How could anyone see that?

"Your friends for sure know what a pervert you are… No?" Kenji whispers near my ear.

"They don't…" I manage.

"But worst of all… Your parents must know what a slutty pervert their daughter is! Right Chijo?" He grins over my shoulder.

"No, please. They can't know!" I whimper in anguish as he breaks me apart.

"Now… I'm going to hurt you. A lot… Prove all their suspicions correct. Everyone knows, Chijo." He informs me.

I tremble in fear as my brain melts. Nobody knows, right? Even I didn't know. He's just saying things…

"You're going to enjoy it, Chijo. Even if you scream in agony, you'll know what you are deep inside you."

"No. I'm not…" I weakly reject his words, but I know what he's going to say. And I know he's right.

"Ma-so-chist!" He whispers again. And disappears from the bedroom.

I hang from my wrists unsure what to think. I more or less willingly had him tie me like this. In exchange I’ll be let free soon. He told me clear as day he is about to hurt me. A lot. And I hang here awaiting my torture. Why? Maybe I truly am a masochist? I want to be hurt? But why? And why never before last week? Does everyone really know? How does he know that everyone knows? No! Nobody knows… He's just playing a game. I think.

Nothing about my life makes sense anymore.

Without warning my ass explodes in pain. "OWWWWWWOWOWOW!" I scream and dance around on my tip-toes.

Kenji hits me again, on the back of my legs this time. I scream my lungs from my body again. He shows me a flat leather paddle and continues to whack me for the next hour. He hits me every few seconds. He taunts me in between. Every time his paddle lands on a different part of tender flesh.

Every hit feels like a slap with a flat hand. It's not super painful, but the anticipation and unexpected impacts are killing me.

It's not all pain and suffering. Sometimes he doesn't hit me at all and just strokes the paddle or a finger across my skin. I flinch and scream just as hard from it though. And just as I think it's over and I relax the paddle lands on my sensitive skin again.

I can't avoid him. I can't resist him. I can't anticipate his erratic swings. And despite my pain. I get terribly horny.

“Kenji… Enough… Please… I do… Any… thing… Let… me down!” I groan and pant in shallow breaths. I can barely form a sentence and tears are streaming down my face and dripping from my chin. Mixing with the sweat that covers my body.

“Shh shh shhhh” Kenji shushes me, as he massages my butt with both hands. Digging his nails in deep and kneading my tender form.

“Kenji, stop… Please, I’ll do anything.” I beg him to stop.

“Anything? So you’ll do this one more thing for me?” He gently asks. “Or are you too weak and want to go home unfinished?”

I’m cornered by my own words and feel that I have no choice but to agree with my cruel master and I weakly nod.

He laughs at me with an all-knowing arrogance about him.

“I knew you’d agree my dear Chijo. Let’s continue.” Kenji whispers in my ear.

“Co…Continue? More?” I stutter. I look at him fearfully.

He laughs again and revels in my tortured fear.

“But of-course. Your backside is broken and bruised. But what about your front?” And without further warning Kenji swings his paddle and hits me on my left breast.

I scream as my skin turns red. Without waiting for me to recover he smacks my right breast and I scream at the roof again. My voice gives out and I can’t take it anymore. I drop down, hanging limply in my bondage as Kenji continues to unleash his frustrations on me, until my front and back are covered in red paddle marks.

“Pay attention now Chijo.” He whispers as his face hovers inches from mine.

With teary eyes I look at him and manage something of a grin. “I… still… here… You… not… defeat… me… I win!”

“We’ll see about that. I’ve beaten you for two hours, Chijo. I can continue for as long as I please.”

My eyes widen with fear. And I whisper barely audible, “Gawd no… Please!” And my head drops down in defeat.

“See? I win Chijo. Not you! But I’ll give you your reward now. Are you ready?!” Kenji wants to know.

What is he talking about? Reward? I hang from my wrists and am about ready to stop paying attention to his insanity. It’s too much.

“Chijo! Spread your legs.” He tells me.

I am so weak I can’t comply. Only when he taps on the inside of my thighs I get startled enough to try and respond.

“Spread them Chijo. As far as you can.” Kenji lightly strokes my vagina with the paddle while I look fearful at it with quivering legs.

“On the third impact you’re going to orgasm. Do you understand Chijo? Not before. Not after.” He lifts my face with the paddle by pushing my chin up.

I struggle to maintain my position and manage to nod and smile vaguely.

“If you get it wrong we’ll start all over. Agreed?”

I groan and nod. “Whatever…”

Then finally, he lines up for a formidable swing as he hits my pussy from below. Before I can recover he hits me again. And I scream my lungs out.

“Here it comes Chijo. Ready?!” Kenji excitedly calls me out with his deep rumbling voice.

He lines up his paddle. He hits me harder than any of the other hits. Letting out a grunt as he puts all his energy behind it.

“Cum for me Chijo!” He shouts his permission at me with an excited voice.

A loud twack is heard. The wetness that drips from my pussy splatters through the bedroom and I scream and spasm as the most powerful orgasm I have ever experienced crashes over me. I contort and pull my legs up to my chest as I scream, followed by a low moan and finally… Nothing.

I hang in my bonds, I'm defeated. All my energy has drained from me and I take quick shallow breaths.

Kenji marvels at the sight, feeling accomplished. Stupid Taylor had done exactly as he anticipated. When Kenji unties the rope, I unceremoniously drop to the floor like a wet towel.

From my neck to my feet my skin is covered in red square paddle marks. A few small drops of blood dribble down where my skin had broken. And throughout all that, the dozens of rope marks are visible as a stark reminder of the days before.

Kenji holds me in his lap and caresses me. He doesn’t care for the blood and sweat. I lay in his embrace like a child. He whispers soothing things at me. One arm he holds across my chest below my breasts. I am unbound, but my muscles don't work. With his other hand he gently massages and plucks at my nipples. He traces circles around my breasts and over my stomach. He fingers my belly button and I flinch at every touch. I quietly moan and twitch as my orgasm ebbs away and my body slowly calms down. He then moves further down and slips two fingers inside of me.

I moan with my eyes closed as he continues to caress and stroke me while whispering how proud he is of me. How beautiful I am. How I should want to stay with him forever, knowing that I can’t. How perfect I am. How I love him, but can’t have him. He tells me what a good masochist I am. How good I did in his Shibari bondage.

And finally he promises to deliver me back to Kanne.

I don’t understand anything he says, but I smile at the soothing sound of his voice. I never want to leave his embrace ever again.

He repeatedly wipes two fingers through my vagina, causing me to shudder every time he does. He makes me taste my own arousal and I suckle on his fingers like a baby as he keeps whispering little compliments and praises into my ear.

I love him…

Kenji disappears after that night.

7 - Bamboozled

That next afternoon I wake up and quickly realize I’m not free as promised. I don’t remember going to sleep. I have no idea how long I slept. But it appears I’m wearing the Kigurumi mask again. Something huge is stuck in my throat and I can’t see a damn thing.

I can breathe quite easily though. But flexing my throat is painful.

“There she is.” I hear the familiar voice from Kanne.

I gurgle through my gag at her and I feel a firm tap on my head.

“In case you’re wondering. I have filled the gag with rubber cement this time. Consider it your punishment for disappearing!” Kanne sounds upset as she says this.

“Mmmm uhn uhmmmm Ohhh!” I panicky moan. She put cement inside me? I feel around my head, there is a weird gap where my mouth should be. Feeling behind my ears, the latches are locked or something. Feeling over my body I feel my skin, so no body suit. And I wear clothes.

“Oh shut up. I was worried sick for you when you weren’t here. And then four days later he finally calls me that you’re back and that I should come get you. I was so relieved, until I saw your fucked up body. Now I’m just angry with you!”

“Ohhhhmmmm?” I moan pathetically.

“Yeah, what the hell did you do in the last four days? Well? Where have you been? You look terrible.” Kanne angrily berates me.

I gurgle and splutter trying to talk but it’s no use. Kanne is clearly out to just be angry, without letting me say anything. But what is there to say really. I had run out on Kyon and her, in a way. And I have behaved like an absolute whore for a man I don’t know.

She taps on my head again. “You know, if you’d just stayed with Kyon nothing would have happened.” Kanne rages on.

“Wuuuhhhhh?” I exclaim in surprise.

“Yeah, you know how that works right? Anime girls going home with guys. Playing their role so he can pretend his waifu is real? He would have propped you up around his house like a doll and taken your photo. Maybe play house for a bit? I told you I would pick you up the next day. Now look at you!”

I keep quiet. No, I don't know about that. I’m shocked, not sure what to think of this. Is she telling the truth? She could, no should, have told me more clearly!

“You Americans are insane!” Kanne insults me and grabs my head and shoves the mouthpiece into my gag, immediately breathing is a struggle again.

I instinctively swallow but the hardened gag sticking into my throat hurts when I do and I cough and choke. Where is Kenji? Where am I? Will I ever see him again? Or what did he say?

I don’t remember. And how did I get here anyway? Was I dressed? Did Kyon touch me while we were alone? Was Kanne already here?

So many questions.

Kanne and Kyon force me into a car and I hear Kanne speak with him. He sounds really sad or worried. When she gets in herself, the car starts and we head back to Tokyo. The cement filled plug is super annoying. Whenever I swallow I feel the hard lump. And every second Kanne is driving I'm further away from Kenji. The realization bothers me even more than the plug.

I suppose I’ve fallen for my captor. I mean, I feel a tingle in my stomach similar to what I felt for boyfriends. That’s not nerves right?

I fidget with the mask clasps but it's not coming off and sigh. I remember my last thoughts when I was with him. How much I wanted to stay with him. All the way to Tokyo I wish he would pluck me from the car and take me back to his house.

Kanne says nothing to me the whole way. She’s constantly on the phone with someone though. Probably her boyfriend.

When we’re back in the AirBnB almost four hours later, Kanne finally talks to me.

“Hurry up, get the mask off. I need to get back home…” She unkindly tells me. She twists something on both sides of my head and shoves me into the bedroom.

Unlike at Kyon’s place when the gag was soft, it’s now cemented solid. It’s bent down my throat and the mask opens up upwards, this makes it hard to remove. I cry and gag on the long lump scraping over my tongue as it comes out.

Fuck you Kanne!

When I’m finally somewhat presentable I sit gingerly on the couch in the living room and Kanne looks into my unfocused eyes. Everything happens in a daze.

“Where is Kenji? I want to see him.” I mumble.

“Kyon’s brother? Who cares?” Kanne asks.

“I care! I want to talk to him!” I yell at Kanne, moving my arms in frustration. I then finally catch a glimpse of myself and stare at them. My god I look horrible. My wrists have purple marks, as well as my upper arms.

“Oh screw you, you’re a worse pervert than all of Tokyo combined. But I can't talk longer. I need to go home.” Kanne grabs her coat.

“Kanne, wait… Please! Talk to me… Don't leave me…” I call out to her.

Kanne turns and looks at me with her hands on her hips.

Something had been bothering me.

“Kyon tried to have sex with me, you know? How do you know it’s just photos with these guys?” She’s a reckless bitch too, just like me. And with a tiny voice I ask my last question, “What were you thinking? Why did you give me away?”

“Kyon would never do that. We went to school together. I trust him.” Kanne’s conviction almost has me believe that I’m wrong.

“Then ask him how my mouth felt…” I mumble.

Kanne softens her tone, “Oh my… Really? I’ll kill him if that’s true!”

I nod, but I don’t really care. I want to talk to Kenji.

“It’s true… Whatever. Where is Kenji? Why did he leave me? Where is my stuff?” My mind is catching up with the world.

Kanne points to the left, “Your suitcase.” She says. And she dramatically raises her shoulders. “Kenji? Unknown. Why do you want him?”

“He did this to me! Where does he live?” I want to know. I really really want to know.

“I love him…” I whisper as my voice trails off.

"Don't be stupid, Kenji would never do such a thing. Plus, he is married!" Kanne hesitates.

I slump to the floor mortified.

“What?” I gasp. “No! Liar! Tell me the truth!”

“That is the truth… Now, I’m sorry but I have to get home.”

I don’t pay attention to her anymore. My head is overflowing. Kenji married? It all makes sense now. Why he was so distant and wouldn’t attach himself to me. Those weird things he said at the end. Me not being able to have him? Or what was it? I don’t really remember.

Unknowingly Taylor is quite right in her assessment. Kenji spends today with his wife and kids, giving it yet another shot to see if he can revitalize his marriage after unleashing all his wants and frustrations on Taylor.

Kanne quietly leaves, leaving me in pieces in the AirBnB.

He can't be married, he’s mine! I pound my wrist on the floor, and grimace at the pain it causes me.

“Kanne? You…” I look around disturbed. But she’s gone.

I contemplate my options. Other than the city name I have no idea where to look for Kenji or Kyon. Google maps tells me it’s a big city too. Impossible. Where would I even start looking?

I sob. I cry. And finally I just weep. All afternoon and into the evening I sit on my knees on the floor leaning face first into my bed and I wail and whine into the mattress until I have no more tears to cry.

It’s about 7PM when I finally come to my senses and climb to my feet. I need a shower. I need food and a drink. And I consider throwing myself off the building.

Worst vacation ever!

Shower first. I stare shocked at my naked self in the mirror. The red paddle marks are fading already, but a few big purple bruises are not. There is dried blood on my right boob and both thighs. Turning around and twisting my back I realize my body is actually hurting. I didn’t quite realize how sore I was when I cried and sat still.

But now? Oof…

With some effort I see my back and spot more specks of blood and another bruise.

I flash a sad grin at my reflection and step into the shower. The hot water hurts, but it makes me feel alive all the same. The shampoo pricks all over my body as the glycerin in it burns my battered skin. As the water rains on me and stress and tension flows away from me, my body shuts down. I start to hurt in earnest. My tits feel like they’re torn off. Even sitting hurts.

“What day is it anyway?” I grumble. I have no idea. Time didn’t matter when I was with Kenji.

Turns out I have six days left before my flight home.

I plunder the nearby McDonalds and lock myself in the AirBnB for most of my time. I don’t know what to do otherwise. I wander a bit around the streets near my apartment, look at a few shops. I try ramen. Simple things. But I don’t feel like exploring Tokyo beyond that.

Sleep, cry and recover, that's the idea. Every waking hour I long for Kenji’s touch. For him to tie my hands to my back and fuck me senseless.

When I google his name and scour facebook and twitter and again don't find him, I wish I could click a button and he would burst through my door and capture me again.

Stupid Chijo! Go home and get over yourself! I curse myself.

Finally it’s time to fly home. Most marks on my body have healed, and I’m mostly back to 'normal'. Whatever that is.

Moving around I feel that everyone stares at me. Every time I show someone my passport, my ticket. Or when my wallet comes out to pay for something the fading rope marks on my wrist show. Every time I interact with someone I know they see my bruised neck, the rope burns on the onset of my shoulders. And most of all I know that everyone sees my sad face.

“Come get me Kenji… Please come find me…” I sniffle quietly as I walk through the airport gate and sit down in the airplane.

8 - Dangerous games

It’s been four months since I got home. I’ve told nobody of my misadventure.

I’m a shadow of my former self. If you thought I was an introvert before going to Japan. Think again! It’s 100 times worse now. I rarely go outside anymore. I ignore the few friends I have, or had. And when I show up for work I do my work on auto-pilot and disappear back home.

I rarely talk to anyone anymore. Even ignoring my parents.

I miss Kenji. I want to do bondage with him.

Kanne had apologized for walking out on me as she had to go to work the next day. She only came to the AirBnB to bring me there. Quite a nice gesture if you think about it, she drove many hours halfway across Japan just for me that day. The following days she tried hard to understand me, but ultimately couldn’t and blocked me on iMessage.

But really, Kanne couldn’t get over herself for what Kyon tried and what Kenji did. Feeling a bit responsible for it all. She never apologized for me not knowing about the anime girl waifu thing though

I didn’t really care at first. I hated seeing her chat notifications, especially in the first few weeks. And when she blocked me I quietly stalked her Reddit account. But when her account got banned or something I couldn’t find her anymore.

Worse yet, there are too many Kenji’s and Kyon’s on Facebook to make sense out of and it seems hopeless to ever find him.

On the plane home I had the scariest thought in, like, forever. Kenji had ejaculated inside me several times and I am lax in taking the pill. Of-course while I was at his house I didn’t take any pill at all. So when I got home I immediately bought a test. I did one every week and all twelve or so tests have been negative.

Today I look relieved at the latest test stick showing that I am still not pregnant. Dodged a bullet there…

My boss Wyatt had hinted to talk several times, seeing my depression. But he never really says anything.

Trying to recapture the moment I have tried self bondage but I only manage to hurt myself. Leaving ugly marks and bruises on my arms and lower legs. Ropes pinch, the straps cut off my bloodstream. I can’t get it right. I had screamed my lungs out from frustration until my throat was sore and had thrown all the straps and ropes in the trash a few days ago.

I had then looked for a place to capture my imagination and found a BDSM club. From the few photos I could find it looks like a classy and safe place. A bit like a nightclub, but with extra activities. I had started hanging around outside of it, wishing I was brave enough to go inside. On my third night of loitering around a handsome middle aged guy spots me and approaches me.

“Hey. How’s it hanging?” He lamely greets me.

“I fell down from hanging…” I mumble, immediately feeling awkward.

“So not doing too good then? What’s your name?” He wants to know as he looks into my eyes with an amused smile.

“Taylor, sir.” I reply.

“What are you doing here at this hour?”

“Nothing…” I look shyly away.

“Let me guess. You had a boyfriend who tied you up, broke up and now you’re too scared to go in there?” He gestures at the club.

“Something like that…” I meekly answer, barely audible.

He laughs heartily at that and I feel stupid.

“Shake my hand…” He holds out his hand.

When I reach out he grabs my wrist and slides up my sleeve. I look startled at him.

“Thought so.” He grins as he sees the fading lines on my wrists. He reaches for my neck and pulls the collar of my jacket aside to the left and then the right. “I see…”

“See what?” I wonder.

“Got those marks anywhere else?” he asks me.

“Yesss…” I whisper, my breathing quickening a little.

He ‘hmms’, “So what’s your deal? And why?”

“I shouldn’t… I don’t know you.” I refuse. I don’t like this guy. He hasn’t even told me his name yet.

“Good answer. But you like pain right? Does it excite you? Or bondage?” He charges on, ignoring my discomfort.

I say nothing and just swallow.

“Both?” He smirks at me.

I slowly take a step back. I feel threatened. Not enough to run away. Just being cautious.

“I’m Mike. I like submissive chicks such as yourself.” He finally introduces himself.

I stare at him. Unsure on how to respond. But I take another step back. I’m not a submissive, right?

“Do you want me to hurt you, see what it feels like?” He steps forward and rests his hand on the side of my neck, with his thumb in front of my throat and lightly squeezes.

I slowly nod, then shake my head.

“No sir… Not really.”

He squeezes a bit harder on my neck and I grimace trying to be strong. “I bet I’m hurting you right now. Come with me.”

He pulls me along by my neck and I stumble along, grasping at his arm, but his grip is strong like a vice. He presses just hard enough on my throat to prevent me from making any loud noises.

I’m getting very scared now and want to escape his strong arm. He purposefully walks towards the bondage club and with a nod to the doorman walks straight in. I’m dragged along through something of a lobby. I think there are a few people there. There is loud club music coming from every direction. Mike barges through a hallway and he throws me into a private room.

Silence surrounds us as I stumble inside and almost fall flat on my face.

“Refuse me and you can go!” Mike calmly says.

“Sir?” I’m too stunned to respond properly, clutching my neck, massaging it.

Mike senses my reluctance and inexperience and sits down a few meters from me.

I can just walk out, I think. But I don’t. Why don’t I?

“Now that you’re in here. You’re one step closer to your fantasy?” Mike wants to know.

When I say nothing he continues.

“Ask me anything… Anything at all to make you more comfortable.” Mike tells me.

“What would you do to me? Here?” I quietly ask. I wonder why I’m not running away.

“That depends on you Taylor.” Mike grins. “But if you let me decide… I’d uh, restrain you and beat you up.”

I inhale sharply through my nose when hearing that. My heart beats fast at hearing the casual promise of pain.

“And what else?”

“Else we set some boundaries, and I beat you up slightly less.”

“Oh…” I shuffle with my feet. I’m ready to leave now. He sounds so unsophisticated. Nothing like Kenji with his clever words and sensuality.

“That’s too rough I think… I’d like to leave now.” I quietly say. I look at the door.

“Alright,” Mike agrees and motions for me to go. “But since you’re here. Why not stick around and have a drink at the bar. Maybe you’ll like someone.”

I nod shyly and shuffle to the door.

“Actually, c’mere…”

“Sir?” I wonder what he wants now.

He points at the floor “Kneel here for a moment and keep looking at me. See what you’re made of.”

I reluctantly change direction and kneel before Mike. Just as I look up at him he smacks me in the face. His flat hand strikes my cheek. I groan and adjust my tilted head to look at him again. He slaps me again and I moan this time. And again I adjust my head so I look at him again with scared eyes.

“Very good. Now tell me. Does that arouse you?” Mike wants to know.

“Yes sir…” I look down at my knees, ashamed of myself.

“I like you Taylor. You seem nice, cute too. You'll make an excellent submissive. Do you still want to leave?”

“You scare me sir. I don’t like it.” I breathlessly admit.

“So go, leave! Find someone you’re comfortable with.” He abruptly orders me. Mike is not an evil man, he knows when to stop.

I quickly make my escape and leave the room. I don’t know what to do now. I’ve just discovered that I am embarrassed to talk about my wants and feelings. Maybe I should get that drink, get super drunk and do something dumb and let someone capture me.

My thoughts are interrupted by an attractive woman saying something to me.

“Wahh?” I stare at her. Of-course I didn’t pay attention to what she said, and the music around me makes it hard to hear normal speech.

She’s wearing some kind of stretchy dress, covering up an ample chest. Pantyhose and low heels. Her hair is in a big bun. She must be in her mid-30s, has smart eyes and a freckled face.

She kinda looks like me but prettier and older. Dark hair too. Ok, she doesn’t look like me. But we both have freckles and a narrow nose.

“Oh behave! You silly cow. Can’t you talk properly?” She belittles me.

“I’m sorry. I’ll leave.” I apologize and start to make a move.

“Hey, just a minute. Who are you? Where have I seen you before?”

“My name is Taylor. It’s my first time here.” I tell her. Here we go again.

“First time inside, yes? But not your first time here. I’ve seen you hang around in the parking lot.”

“I guess. I don’t know.” I admit.

“You poor thing. You look so lost. Can I help with anything?” She offers her assistance.

“I eh. Him, in there. I don’t know. I ehh…” I stammer. “I’m just looking for a friend I guess. I’ll go home if you want.”

The woman peeks through the door and sees her friend Mike, he’s talking on the phone.

“Oh that big meanie? He said he’d beat you up huh?” She talks to me like I'm a little kid that needs comforting.

I nod. “He slapped me.”

“He does that to all submissive girls he finds. Don’t let him scare you. Come here.” She reaches out and we hug. Her bosom is soft and comforting. Her embrace causes all tension to leave my body and I feel at peace for the moment.

“I’m sorry. I don’t know what I’m doing anymore.” I sniffle and my eyes tear up.

The woman guides me to the next private room and pushes me inside while my head is buried in her chest. Before I know it I’m sitting on a table and she clicks a collar around my neck, locking it with a small padlock. It’s a slender smooth steel band. I stare at her.

“What are you doing?” I ask her.

“You’re mine now.” She dangles the keys in front of my face. “OK?”

“Yeah OK. Whatever… Just don’t kill me.” I mumble. This woman seems more smart and likable.

She frowns at me. “Hey, look at me. What kind of attitude is that?” She grabs my chin and makes me look at her.

“I’m sorry… I’m just depressed, I’m trying to replace something. I can’t find it.” I meekly say.

She sees my arm and like Mike slides up my sleeve. “You did this to yourself?”

I nod my head, “Yes…” I sniffle again. “I suck at bondage…”

“You need a mistress! Me…!” She confidently informs me.

Just as I want to refuse, she hooks her finger through the loop on my collar and pulls my face close to hers, “You’re one of those masochist perverts aren’t you?”

I nod more energetically now.

“I should spank you for not coming to me sooner!” She scolds me and pulls me along by my collar and out of the room.

“Mike you big buffoon! You and your dumb manners. Look at this vulnerable girl!” The woman bellows into the room Mike is still in. He’s still talking into his phone.

He stares at us with a disturbed look and sees me awkwardly bent over as the woman controls me through the collar.

“Yeah? So?” He calls out. He makes a gesture to his phone but the woman ignores it.

“You could’ve had her, fuck her ass or beat her to a pulp. But now she’s mine!” The woman claims me in front of Mike and everyone in ear-shot. I know there are others nearby.

“Ehh…” I stammer. I don’t want to get ass fucked.

“Quiet girl or I’ll slap you.”

“Wahh? No!”

smack

A hand flashes through my vision and hits my cheek.

“Oww ow! Sorry!” I wince in pain.

When the woman is done making Mike jealous, I’m pulled to the bar where I have to buy her a drink. There are about a dozen people inside. About half of them wear collars, some are men. I can choose any drink for her as long as I pick a good expensive red wine. And over the next hour she makes me tell her everything about me and my masochist tendencies. When she notices I’m leaving bits out she looks sternly at me and says to include every detail.

“Stop!” She says three glasses of wine in. I’m just about to tell her how Kanne walked out on me.

“Enough, You’re coming with me. To my place.” She announces.

I’m not sure if I want that. I’m not a lesbian. Hell, I don’t even know her name. I shyly look around, there are a couple of other people hanging out, but nobody pays attention to us.

The woman waves for the bill and I have to pay for her drinks. $45 dollars for a few glasses of wine. Geez.

9 - Mistress Jenna

On the way to her house I try to ask her for her name, or what she wants with me exactly. But she just tells me to be quiet and follow her lead. She does promise me that if I keep asking questions she’ll punish me. I'm tempted to ask more questions, but without knowing her current plan I decide not to for now.

20 minutes later I’m bent over her kitchen table and try to see what is going on behind me. But I can’t turn my head far enough.

She had pulled me down onto the table by my collar which is tied to something underneath it. Then she pulled down my jeans but left my underwear in place. I’m otherwise unbound, yet totally helpless. I feel very vulnerable.

The woman lives in a nice house I think. Some free-standing house with a garden. Similar to what I live in, but bigger and more luxurious. Inside it looks nice enough, but it went so fast and it's dark, it's like 1AM or something, I didn’t really have time to take it all in. Just as I turn my head and look forward I hear a swoosh and my butt explodes in pain.

“Owowowwww!” I whine in surprise and cover my butt with my hands. I look behind me again. There she is, wearing just a pair of black panties and matching bra holding her double massive breasts. She has a narrow waist and smooth tanned skin. In a flash I think she looks domineering and magnificent.

She’s holding a riding crop.

“Remove your hands!” she orders me.

I let my hands drop next to me and the riding crop comes down several more times on my butt and the back of my legs. I whine and moan every time she hits me.

After ten strokes she unclips my collar from the table and I slide over the table top and drop to the floor. I quietly cry but I’m oh-so horny. My panties are visibly wet. I keep my eyes closed, I’m too embarrassed with myself to do anything or risk making eye-contact.

The woman walks around me and a glass is held to my mouth and I greedily drink the sweet tasting fruity drink.

“Thanks mistress…” I mumble blindly.

“You didn’t earn it to call me mistress yet.” Her sweet voice quietly turns me down.

I shrug and say nothing. Thinking, just make me cum already and get it over with. I don’t care at all for her role-play. I finish my drink and she takes me into her living room and we sit on the couch.

I stare at her bra to avoid eye-contact and think my dinky little B-cup is tiny in comparison.

“Taylor, you did very well just now. You’re very obedient, you know that?”

I slowly nod and mumble thanks. My butt hurts a little and I’m very aroused.

“I’ll be your mistress from now on. You can call me Jenna,” She feels that Taylor isn’t into the whole ‘call me mistress’ thing.

I look up and hold out my hand and smile. “Hello Jenna, how do you do?”

Jenna laughs and playfully shakes my hand.

“Nice to meet you Taylor. I really like you. But I have to admit I think you’re playing a very dangerous game.”

“Why?” I wonder.

“You just went home with a stranger after telling her your very personal story, and let her tie you up. Does anyone even know you’re here? Do you realize how vulnerable you are?” Jenna lectures me.

“Kenji took me home too and it went fine.” I mumble.

Jenna leans forward and looks sternly at me, “Not everyone is like Kenji.”

I swallow, “I’m sorry, I won’t do it again.”

“I know you won’t, you’re mine now. As your mistress I hereby forbid you to see other partners. Understand?” Jenna commands me. “No boyfriends, no flirting, no Tinder, no dates, no girlfriends…” She adds.

I just stare at her and dumbly nod.

We’re silent for a moment. I truly don’t know what to do or think. Kenji had not talked to me and just did whatever he wanted, and I liked that mysterious approach so much… The loss of control.

Jenna has just whipped me, set me free and now she plays my friend. It's confusing. Can I go home? What time is it anyway? Is she keeping me in her house? Or what? And… Do I want this? Is there a way out?

I gather all my willpower and ask all the important questions.

“Are you a lesbian?” I look up at her when I ask.

“Sometimes I think so. But no.” Jenna admits, a smile on her face.

“Am I your girlfriend now?” I ask next. Dreading to hear the answer.

“No Taylor, you’re my plaything, a toy if you will. If you’re good to me or if you impress me you can become my friend. And if you are truly special then maybe, MAYBE, we can discuss other options.”

I nod, I get it. But not really though. And in that case it doesn't matter if either of us is lesbian.

“Can I go home?” I meekly request.

“If I let you, would you want to?” She counters. Looking closely at my reaction.

I shake my head and assert myself. All this talking, weak-sauce!

I blurt out. “Kenji kept me tied up for five days, non-stop, and I had zero freedom or control over anything. He didn’t talk to me. He didn’t listen to me. I told you I hated it, but really I loved it. I LOVE HIM! And now I want what he did, every… fucking… day! He left this huge huge gap that needs filling. And I can’t seem to find anything to fill it with. It’s the worst feeling ever!”

I take a deep breath and Jenna looks amused at me.

“I know I’m just a stupid girl to you. But can you consider my position and not just fuck around for your own shallow entertainment? Kenji hurt me and loved me and I never knew what he was going to do next. Then he whipped me for two hours and still could make me feel good. You hit me, what? Ten times? Then you let me loose and praise me? Be my friend? Do you think you’re a mean mistress? That you hurt me or that it impresses me? IT'S NOTHING!”

I had talked louder and louder during my rant and spit the last few words into the room. Fuck I’m so frustrated. I want to shout at her to just be mean and do something incredible, but instead I stop talking and look fearful at her.

“I’m sorry. I overstepped, I’ll leave. Sorry, sorry!” I apologize and start to get up.

Jenna is taken aback at my outburst. And then smiles, but with a commanding voice she tells me, “Not at all, sit down!”

When I sit back down she loops her finger through my collar, like she did in the club. I yelp as she yanks me down to her knees.

“I can be mean. I can hurt you if you want. In fact, I prefer it!” She sneers with a menacing tone in her voice.

I whimper and submit. Finally something real! And cry out, “Yes yes, please. Do it!”

“But don’t forget Taylor, it’s role play!” She lets go of me and leans back on the couch.

I stay in my bent over position, “I know my role and I’m tired of playing! Mistress!” I yell from the couch seat.

Jenna looks down on Taylor and realizes the opportunity. A desperate submissive masochist on her couch? What luck! Her new slave has just arrived. Taylor will be in her grasp for the foreseeable future.

“Very well then. Do you have anything to do this weekend?” She inquires.

“No, nothing!” I confirm that I am available.

“Good. Then get naked and quit wasting my time. Leave your things here on the couch and get into the basement. No more talking or questions.”

For a moment I stare at her in fear. My mind is in turmoil, but before I can chicken out I stand straight and strip naked. Her attitude change is very sudden, very domineering. Gone is the friendly woman.

I look around for the basement.

“Out the door, to the right, first door on the left. The light switch is to the left of the door. GO!” Jenna bosses me around and is done playing nice it seems.

I nervously follow her instructions and step down into the dark basement. The wooden stairs creak as my weight lands on it.

Jenna folds Taylor's clothes and puts everything on the coffee table. She then follows her into the basement.

I stand more or less in the middle of the room and look curiously around. It looks like a torture room. This is not a bondage room I think, this room exists to inflict pain. I’m pretty sure. And I wonder what kind of mistress Jenna is. Two sets of manacles and chains hang along one wall. A cabinet with shelves filled with some leather items, chains and a dildo and such stands in a corner. There is a small cage under the stairs. A table along the wall opposite the stairs.

I feel a huge knot growing in my stomach. What am I getting myself into now? I stroke my vagina lips and am amazed at how wet I am down there. I ‘mmmph’ quietly as I stroke myself again and subconsciously lift my hand and suck on my fingers. I’m such a slut for myself.

The stairs creak and Jenna comes down. She looks very serious and stands in front of me.

“What do you want to do first? Oh, wait… You gave up your right to choose.” She asks me with a voice that sounds mocking, or maybe taunting.

I shrug. “You’re the boss.”

I don’t really care what she’s going to do, my assumption is that she’ll whip me for a bit and then let me go. I’ll think about my decisions and if I want to continue with her when I get home soon.

Jenna sighs as if I’m a huge bother to her. I feel like I'm wasting her time just because of that. She turns and looks in the cabinet. I’m so nervous now that I almost call it quits. When she returns she holds a leather cap over my head.

"Last chance…" She wonders.

"I… Yes… Just do it already…" I sigh. All this talking… Geez.

“So be it. Not a word from now on, Taylor. I’m not very happy with your attitude so far. Thinking I’m some kind of softie, impatient, No respect!” And she works the leather over my head. It’s a tight fit and she roughly turns me around and pulls on the zipper in the back. I hear a click. Because of the tight fit I can’t really open my mouth, so no more talking. My nose pokes through a triangular hole allowing me to breathe.

I think I hear Jenna rummage through the cabinet. I reach behind my head, a padlock hangs from the zipper. A hand slaps my hands away and Jenna removes the collar I have been wearing. Replacing it with another.

Another click.

“This one can not be removed.” She whispers in my ear. “I thought we could be friends and do some friendly role-play. You know, decide on some limits and a safe word. But after your outburst… you’re not even a fun toy. You’ll be a slave. For a loooooong time.”

I’m shocked, I didn’t agree to that at all. She sounds so mean. But I can't help but notice that my vagina drips in anticipation.

10 - Pain and tricks

I hear a cheery beep and Jenna tells me to be honest and answer her simple questions with a clear nod or head shake.

"Is your name Taylor Long? From Houston, Texas?"

I nod my head.

"Are you 19 years old and capable of making your own decisions?"

I nod again.

"Are you here by your own choice and of your own free will?"

I nod again, what is she getting at?

"Alright, now for some specifics…" Jenna sweetly informs me.

“Will you do anal?”

I shake no.

“Vaginal?”

I eagerly shake yes. Lots of orgasms please!

“Pain?”

I nod again. At this point I’m convinced that she won’t be harsh with her whip. It’s just role play right? She said so herself.

“Until you bleed?”

I shake no. But then think back at the tiny trickles of blood Kenji caused and change my mind and nod yes. Whatever, role-play right?

"So it's OK if you get hurt and need a band-aid?"

I hesitate, how much hurt? But I nod anyway.

“Other people can have sex with you?”

I vigorously shake no.

“Can other people see you?”

Another vigorous no.

“Will you come back and be my slave every weekend from now on?”

I nod, slowly though. Maybe not every weekend? I hesitate.

“As a slave, do you understand that there will be no safe word, no limits outside of reason, and you can not refuse anything I do?”

I nod, slower yet again. Maybe I don't want to be a slave… Actually, I never said I wanted to be.

“Do you understand that you’re here for the sole purpose of giving me pleasure?”

I hesitate, but nod. Pleasure as in sex? It's just role play, I tell myself. I'm actually getting quite scared now. And what's with all the questions? With Kenji it was so much easier.

"And, do you understand and consent that you are under my complete and absolute control until I decide to end our role play?"

This has me pause. But after a few seconds I nod the affirmative.

I hear another cheery beep-beep, and I hear Jenna smirk. Did she just film my consent? But I'm wearing a mask… What good is that?

“You’re so wonderfully naive… You just gave your life to me and gave me full control over you! Forever!” Jenna whispers, she sounds quite pleased with my answers.

I tense up, what does that mean? It's just a game, yes? I hum at her through my mask to ask for clarification. But she ignores me.

A chain clinks and rattles and cold steel chain links wrap around my left wrist twice. The ominous click of a lock. With a whirring sound the chain raises me up and pulls tight on my wrist. I have no choice but to balance on my toes.

I whimper through the mask. She’s not using rope?

Two hands stroke my back and slide forward cupping my breasts. Then Jenna's evil voice whispers in my ear, “Ever been hit with a chain?”

I tense up at hearing this. I’m indeed a naive dumbass. What did I agree to now?!

Her head touches mine as she whispers with a low voice, “I have a blowtorch too… We'll use that tomorrow.”

I scream in panic and try to get away, I claw at the chain on my wrist with my free hand but it has a large padlock holding it in place.

Jenna's tricks and evil words work wonderfully and she laughs at Taylor's reaction. When she strokes her back. Taylor flinches and yelps, thinking Jenna struck her with something.

I shiver with fear and listen intently. When I hear a chain clink, I swivel towards the sound. Then there is a sound from my other side and I rotate the other way. I sense a presence and Jenna sniffs my neck.

“I smell you, slave! You stink of fear and arousal. It excites me…”

She steps back and swings the chain in her hands. The quarter inch links hit my stomach and the tip whips around my waist and smacks into my lower back.

I howl in pain and hop around on one leg, lifting the other trying to cover myself.

Jenna swings again and hits my stomach again, and again the tip whips around me and hits my back. I pull up both of my legs and dangle by my wrist and scream in pain.

“Oh my, bleeding already?” Jenna laughs.

Taylor is not bleeding, not even close. The chain leaves a weirdly shaped mark but that’s it. Jenna is playing a very mean psychological game.

The chain hits me again, across my boobs this time and the tip hits right below my armpit. I howl in pain and my legs give out as I try to avoid her torture.

“You’re not as tough as you thought, huh?” Jenna shouts at me as she scratches her nails down over my sites.

She mocks my voice, deforming it, “Kenji hit me for two hours, do you think you’re mean?” And then in her own voice. “Fuck you! Three hits and you’re a sobbing mess. Absolutely pathetic.”

I feel stupid and weak the way she talks to me. I regret being alive, it hurts so much. When her hand smacks my vagina it lands with a wet splat, she cups it and wiggles her middle finger inside and I gasp through my tears and orgasm on her hand. It’s the first orgasm I ever had that I do not enjoy. I moan and shake on my wobbly legs. And blubber through the mask for Jenna to let me go.

Jenna looks at her wet hand and grins. She wipes her hand on my stomach and enjoys seeing me flinch.

I’m then lowered to the floor and Jenna removes the chain from my wrist, she then drags me to the cage under the stairs and tells me to crawl forward. I have no idea what’s happening and when I don’t crawl quick enough she gives me a kick in my butt and shoves me in with her foot. The door clangs shut, another click from a padlock. And I’m left alone.

When I get to my senses a little, I feel all over my body but I find no blood I think. Just sweat. I explore my hood, but it remains locked on tight. A collar circles my neck just below the hood. I feel no locks or any markings other than the welded on loop at the front. Surely I can go home now right?

When nothing happens I drop face forward to the floor and eventually fall asleep dreaming of happier times.

Jenna comes for me the next morning. I still lay on my face with my ass in the air leaning against the side of the cage. I’m in a deep uncomfortable sleep and don’t notice her opening the door or her talking to me.

“Good morning slave!” Jenna chipper announces.

I don’t respond and calmly breathe as I sleep.

She gives me a kick and I snort and tense up.

“Come slave. Get out.” She commands me.

“Out? Out of what?” I don’t even know where I am. My ankle is grabbed and I’m pulled backwards.

Jenna inspects the damage she has done to Taylor and concludes it's superficial. Three small purple bruises from the tip of the chain. And three fading markings where she hit her stomach and boobs. Jenna then inspects my wrist and sees the indents the chain has made, but that will fade in a few days. Nothing to worry about.

“Mmhm…” She hums content to herself.

I have somewhat awoken by now and curl up on the floor. I feel like going home. This is much worse than what Kenji did and I’m not sure about my wisdom to agree with being here. I'm convinced that Jenna doesn’t care for me. She just wants to get off on making me suffer. Kenji cared, I think. I want to believe that Kenji fell in love with me but was held back by his marriage.

“Care for some breakfast?” Jenna asks me with her chipper voice. Maybe some toast and a glass of milk?

My stomach churns at the thought of food and I shake my head ‘no’ and groan.

“Alright, then we can continue right away.” Jenna tells me. “It’s only Saturday morning, you have all weekend to make me happy…”

I hum frantically and shake my head no, crawling away from her voice. I don’t want her pain. I want Kenji’s pain, or something similar. But where am I going to go. I can’t see a thing. I hear Jenna laugh and she grabs my right ankle. I squeal and double my escape efforts.

Ten minutes later I’m hanging from my ankles and Jenna starts her next game. I lightly sway back and forth after struggling with her to try and get her to not continue. But she is too strong for me.

I hear a lighter click and with a popping sound a torch is activated. I feel the heat of the flame near my nipples. Slowly swaying across my chest. Inside the mask my eyes go wide and I scream and squirm.

Taylor goes berserk and struggles so wildly that Jenna has to put the torch away or she’ll actually burn her. That's not her intent.

“Hang still stupid. The whip didn’t impress you, remember?” She scolds me.

Maybe, but I didn’t consent to actual torture. But with the heat gone I calm down.

“Dumb bitch! You’ll learn your place soon enough.” She belittles me.

I mumble in my mask desperately begging for her kindness and to let me go.

“Well, I guess I’ll write my name on your back. Everyone will be able to see what you are.” Jenna explains to me what the activity of the day will be.

I cringe at hearing this and whine through the mask.

“It’ll feel cold at first, when the flame hits. Then it’ll go numb. Don’t bite your tongue!” Jenna warns me.

I helplessly hang and cry uncontrollably. Jenna ignores my fear and prepares her bucket with ice cones and a piece of chicken. A moment later I flinch and scream as an ice cold sensation hits my back. I twist and struggle to avoid the supposed blowtorch, which Jenna goes full throttle on behind my back. She’s scorching the chicken breast and the smell of burnt flesh fills the room. I feel what I imagine is blood dripping over my back and damn near pass out while Jenna rubs the melting ice cream cones over my spine and shoulder blades. More or less writing ‘JENNA’ on my back with them.

When she’s done and she throws the half melted ice cones and the piece of burned chicken in the bucket she squats in front of my face and holds my head. I’m a blubbering mess while she praises me for my resilience and how beautiful I look now.

Jenna grins at her tricks and thinks it’s enough for now. Taylor has suffered enough. Jenna's superiority is more or less established and hopefully Taylor realizes she's been 'captured'. Her point is made.

She releases me and removes the hood. I’m then pushed up two sets of stairs and shoved into the upstairs bathroom. There she tells me to take all the time I need and that she’s waiting for me in the garden.

I had spun around in front of the mirror to see my burned body, but there is no damage of-course. I also cannot find any blood or real damage from the chains. Twenty minutes I spent twisting and turning in front of the mirror trying to wrap my broken mind around what happened and come to the conclusion that everything she did or said was a cruel trick.

Now I sit in her shower and the steaming hot water falls over me. I don’t like the temperature, it’s too hot. But I don’t care enough to reach up and adjust the temperature. I just sit there quietly crying and thinking about how fucked up I am.

This has to stop. Today!

My head is spinning from the last twelve hours. What the actual fucking fuck! Taylor Long! You ought to get home and forget this mad woman! Find a boyfriend and live an ordinary life. Forget this madness and be normal. I talk to myself in my head.

But what is normal anymore?

Almost two hours later I finally can bring up the strength to turn off the shower. My skin is all pruned and red from the hot water. I look absolutely terrible. I don't see my clothes so I wrap a luxuriously soft towel around myself and go looking for Jenna. I find her in the garden sunbathing in just a pair of panties.

“Jenna?” I greet her as I sit next to the cruel bitch.

Jenna opens her eyes and smiles at me. “Hello cupcake. You look like crap. How do you feel?”

“I don’t know. You’re the biggest liar I have ever met. Nothing was real?” I cast my eyes down for being so terribly foolish.

“You just choose to believe it was real." Jenna informs me. "But, you're my slave. That's real. The collar is real too, my gift to you.”

I look sad and fidget with the collar. I don’t know what to say.

“Go home Taylor. I took your consent on video. I took pictures of you. The collar stays on too. Come back next weekend and we’ll continue.”

“Video and photos!? I didn't agree to that! And continue what? Why? I'm not your slave…” I quietly say. I'm stunned at these revelations.

“Yes you are, I have you on video agreeing to be my slave for as long as I want. So, no time limit, or any limit.” Jenna slyly informs me.

“Jenna please. You can’t do that. And what will people say of this?” I counter, I jiggle the collar.

“Just pretend it’s a choker…” Jenna tells me, ignoring my refusal.

"I'm not gonna…" I refuse.

"Then enjoy seeing yourself on every porn site for the rest of your life. I'm sure your parents, friends and coworkers will appreciate some high resolution photos of you too? No?"

I look shocked at her, but submit. "Fine… But I don't want to!"

She won’t defeat me…

"You don’t have to want to. You’re my slave. Slaves obey!" Jenna coldly says, “So, be here. Next week on Saturday, 9AM.”

11 - Wyatt to the rescue

This torture routine goes on for over three months. Jenna has many photos and videos by now, filming my consent with a hood on didn't matter in the end. She can expose me any moment now. She uses that to make me come back every weekend, and even some weeknights.

On the second weekend she made me unlock my phone and now she has all my contacts. She's ready for maximum humiliation should I go rogue.

Needless to say, I hate this woman. But more so myself for letting myself get entangled in her web of tricks. What the fuck was I thinking that night at the club?

My co-workers at work have finally stopped wondering why I wear a steel collar. My parents think it’s stupid. They think I'm stupid, and since I don't want to tell them about my problems they have stopped talking to me.

Most of my friends have stopped talking to me as well. Probably since I'm never available anyway and generally act like a reclusive nerd.

I'm sure everyone thinks I'm a depressed weirdo. But I remain tightlipped.

Nobody knows of my suffering, well everyone knows. But nobody knows why I'm like this. Nobody knows where I disappear to on the weekends either. And nobody knows what marks, and sometimes injuries, I’m hiding under my clothes.

If my Japan misadventure pushed me into a bubble, Jenna causes me to straight up isolate myself.

But nobody can ever know. I'd rather die than face that level of humiliation…

Every week I obediently show up at Jenna's house. The bus takes like 80 to 90 minutes to get there from where I live. It's the longest, most dreadful hour and a half of my week… Every week I endure her cruelty and after all this time I still know nothing about her.

I guess I know a few things, but who cares? For example, I know she likes expensive red wine. I also know that she goes to the bondage club once or twice a month. And I think that she just likes to hurt me for the fun of it.

The look in her eyes is a tell.

Every time I try to know more about her she tells me that a slave doesn't need to know her owner. So I don't know her last name, or what kind of work she does. I don't know if she has a boyfriend, or even if she prefers tea or coffee.

I guess I know nothing useful about her other than her first name.

As you can imagine, I wish I would never have met her. Should have gone with Mike at the club. Or better yet, I should have stayed home that night.

Am I happy with my life? Nope!

Do I enjoy the pain she causes me? Not really. Sometimes I do, but it's nothing like what Kenji did to me.

It's been another long painful weekend and my stomach and side is covered in bruises. When I arrive at work on Monday I once again am in visible discomfort. I grimace and wave at my boss, Wyatt, and head to my cubicle.

"Taylor, to my office please?" He calls after me.

"Hey, why?" I wonder. Can I not just disappear into my cubicle in peace?

"We need to talk… In private." He frowns seriously at me, indicating this is not a topic for cubicles.

When the door closes behind us he sits me down in front of his desk and stares over my shoulder out of the window.

"What did he do to you now?" Wyatt inquires. He sounds upset.

"Who did what?" I ask. I don't understand.

"Your boyfriend, husband, or whoever hits you."

"It's ehh… I'd rather not say. It's nothing." I refuse to answer.

"Alright, then you're going to sit there until you tell me how 'nothing' is causing you so much pain lately. Because to me it looks like you need a rescue from a domestic abuse thing. I've watched you deteriorate for seven months… I can't stand it any longer!" Wyatt insists, he drops in his chair behind the desk and starts his day.

I hear his computer start up, he checks his agenda or something. And after five minutes he gets up and walks around the desk and me and looks out his office window that's next to the door, over the cubicles, supposedly my many co-workers are arriving.

"It's Jenna…" I finally say, I'm ashamed to look at him.

"That's your mother?" He curiously asks.

"No… just some woman."

"Come on Taylor. I'm your boss, I care for you! Your work performance is shit, you don’t socialize anymore. You’re lucky that I like you or you’d be fired weeks ago…” Wyatt berates me.

I look over my shoulder and see him wave at someone. But then he continues his rant.

“I'm worried for you, you used to be so much better. And now 'some woman' just happens to regularly hurt you? Explain to me how that works." He bursts out.

"Don't tell anyone, OK?" I whisper.

He steps away from his door window and pulls up a chair next to me and sits down, "If I legally can, I won't spill your secret." He promises.

Almost an hour later Wyatt knows almost everything. About Kenji in Japan, well most of it, I told him we did some bondage and that I'm super in love with him. He knows that I've been searching for Kenji for seven months but can't find him. I told him how Jenna blackmails me and how cruel she is to me. And how I see no way out from the mess I got myself into. I lift my shirt and show Wyatt my latest bruises, I tell him the one on my side hurts the most today.

He stares at my bra and the purple skin poking out from under it. He listens and frowns repeatedly when things get a bit crazy. But he says nothing. No judgement. Like he has heard it all before. But I like his silence, it's comforting.

"And that broken finger a few weeks ago? Because of her?"

I nod. "It was dislocated. An accident."

"Ouch!" he pulls a face. "And your eye and cheek? You didn't fall out of a bus, did you?"

I shake my head. "She hit me there with a chain. Another accident."

"And the reclusive behavior?"

"Probably…" I admit.

"I see… And you want out, right?"

"Oh gawd yes! I'd give anything to get away from her." I gasp. "But I can't…"

While he asks these things he sits behind his desk again and thinks for a moment. While doing so he's idly typing 'Kenji Nakano' in every search box he can think of. He googles the name, but that shows a million results. Snapchat and tiktok have a ton of profiles. Even Pinterest, Medium, Github. Every site he can think of. Nobody on Instagram though. He wonders how many of these results are who she's looking for but are just unrecognizable for them. He then types Kenji's name into LinkedIn.

I had fallen quiet. Talking to someone who doesn't judge me feels good. I'm not entirely lost in this world. I stare at my knees and think about what will happen to me now.

We sit for a few moments while Wyatt types on his computer. But then he suddenly asks, "Shi-zu-o-ka right? This guy?"

He clicks on a profile photo and turns the monitor to me. I stare at Kenji. He looks all business like, and a few years younger than I remember, but that's him. No mistake possible.

"I… Yes… How did…? What site is this?" My eyes go big. Like, what the hell? I've been searching all over the fucking internet for my man for months and he finds him in literally two minutes?

"Just LinkedIn, it's like Facebook but for business people." Wyatt says. His enjoyment of his discovery is very obvious.

I don't listen to him and stare at the photo with tears in my eyes. Kenji, my Kenji… Finally!

"I can send him a message for you if you want. Maybe he remembers you."

"Yes, yes! Please, yes!" And I cringe at the pain in my side as I veer up. "Tell him eh…" I'm lost for words.

"I'll write something, don't worry." Wyatt grins at me. Taking on the challenge for a female pickup line.

"Cute freckles from Houston in need of rescue!" He voices out as he types.

"Pfft!" I laugh, "That sounds lame."

"Alright, how about this? A little more serious. 'My name is Wyatt, Taylor Long from Houston works for me at my office. She visited you seven months ago. She misses you and really wants to talk to you.' And then you add your email or something." He offers.

"Yes, sure… Add my phone too, and messenger." I agree.

Omg Kenji! I wiggle in my chair with excitement, ignoring my pain.

The message is sent 20 seconds later.

"Here's hoping, right?" He winks at me. "Now, about this Jenna. How will you deal with her? Obviously that has to stop."

I look startled, "I ehm, I don't know. I guess I'll end up on Pornhub…" I let my head drop.

"Why don't you stay after work. Write her address here," He gives me a post-it block. "You, me and some buddies go talk to her. OK?" Wyatt offers his assistance.

"You're going to beat her up?" I wonder.

"We probably should… Put her in that cage she's got?" We grin at that, "But no, we'll scare her a bit so she'll let you loose."

I nod. "Yeah ok. Also make her delete my photos and things?"

Now Wyatt hesitates, shaking a fist at someone while at a door is one thing. But if he has to enter the house and actually make her do something. That requires a different kind of friend.

"Yeah… I guess I offered that." He forces a smile. "Go back to your cubicle, try to do some work OK? Actually, have a strong cup of coffee first. Bring me one too. I need to make a few calls and check a few things."

"Yes ok…"

We both get up and I hug Wyatt as strong as I can without groaning in pain. He pats my back and promises that I'll be free tonight.

"I'd love you forever if you were single! My savior and hero…" I stupidly whisper in his ear. "Really really thank you. If I can ever repay you… Anything at all." My most sincere words of affection in months.

"That would be nice… But, alas. I’m married. And you're in love with Mr. Japan.” He jokes, “Just be a good employee and we're square. OK? Happy to help." He laughs, happy to help. Yes. Wyatt hopes he can make good on his promise.

He cares for his team.

That afternoon me and Wyatt head to Jenna's house. I'm so nervous, but he won't tell me what the plan is. When we arrive on the corner of her street, two men are already waiting for us. They lean against a big white SUV with federal license plates. I want to ask who they are but Wyatt says to not ask questions about the two men and to focus on the 'mission'.

One is a tall black man, he looks like a rugby player. A gold colored badge dangles on his chest. The other looks like a mercenary adventurer guy I think, he's wearing desert color camouflage pants, a red shirt and a matching camouflage hat. Both have a gun on their hip.

"They have guns! Just visible like that?" I point out. What kind of friends are these?

"Yep…" Wyatt simply confirms, but he doesn't elaborate.

We park behind the vehicle and introduce ourselves. Well I do. The two men have no names apparently. I try to read the badge but it just says 'CID' and 'Special Agent' on it and some text I can't read. I don't know what CID stands for. Never heard of that. I'm weirded out by all this, but it's also exciting!

I show my bruises and camouflage man says, "Oh yes. That's not nice…"

"No, that's not from a game." The black man agrees. "So it's definitely there? Any security on the door? Cameras? Any weapons?" He then wants to know.

"Yes… There, with the blue door. I don't think there are any cameras." I confirm.

"And weapons? Guns?" The black man asks again.

"Dunno, I never saw any." I shrug.

"And these photos and shit? That's on a computer?" Camouflage guy wants to know.

"She uses an iPhone, I don't know… I never saw a computer either." I inform them.

The two men glance at each other and nod.

"Alright. Wyatt, stay behind us. You do NOT enter the house, under no circumstance. Got it? And you, wait here 'till Wyatt comes for you. Ok?"

I nervously nod. "You're the police?"

"We're not here… It's just you and Wyatt." He holds a finger to his lips.

Wyatt winks at me and the three men head out. I watch them approach Jenna's home while I stand next to the SUV looking very out of place.

The black man pounds on the door until Jenna opens it. He immediately raises his arm as if to grab her. Jenna of-course reacts and steps back while raising her own hand, I think. I can't really see. He provoked an assault so they can enter? I wonder if that's legal. Suddenly all three step inside and out of sight. Wyatt closes the door and leans casually against the wall. He's looking around as if he's checking if anyone saw them.

"Some kind of swat team? Or special forces? Must be… And Wyatt is the lookout?" I mutter.

I wonder how Wyatt knows these people. After a few minutes Wyatt waves at me to come over. I'm so scared, now I have to face Jenna? I slowly walk over and join Wyatt on the porch.

"I think they're in the living room. Go delete your things." He smiles at her.

"What are they doing? Who are they?" I whisper.

"They're kind of like army police. Friends of mine. Don't be afraid." Wyatt reassures me and gently pushes me to the front door.

I swallow my fear and slowly step into the familiar house. 40 minutes later we leave Jenna's house and part ways at the cars. I feel a whole lot better. I think we deleted all the crap Jenna had on me.

I'm free!

12 - Moving to Japan

Kenji had responded to Wyatt's message about a week later and quickly found his way into Taylor's inbox.

They really click, and once Taylor got over her shame she had told Kenji everything that happened in the past year. How her life fell apart without him around, Jenna, her brief self-bondage thing, her self-imposed isolation and how she is very alone in the world.

He saw the opportunity and had immediately invited her to come over to Japan, start a new life with him. He’ll be her lover, partner in crime and her mentor. After she learned that he divorced his wife shortly after she left, Taylor had almost immediately accepted.

It took less than a day and only two sentences from Wyatt to help her decide.

“Follow your heart! And let nothing or nobody stop you!” Was all he said.

Over the following few weeks she took to calling him ‘Shishō’ which means Master, but in the context of a mentor or teacher. She likes the sound of the word, she feels he is her teacher in life. It just fits.

5 months later Taylor has sold her house and she even got to keep some money after repaying her mortgage.

Her parents didn't want to see her off, they've pretty much disowned her by now. First she's ensnared by some crazy woman, and now Taylor is running off to Japan to chase a guy she doesn't know. They don't want anything to do with that, and told Taylor to not talk to them until she comes to her senses.

Taking their words to heart, Taylor ignores them right back and sets out to go to the airport by herself. Hauling her luggage to the office on her last work day, ready to leave right after.

Wyatt surprised her, and he and his wife took Taylor to the airport. It was a hearty goodbye and she thought that he was super sweet! They've become casual friends since the rescue and his kindness has helped her a lot to get back on her feet.

Today, Kenji waits at Tokyo airport, it’s early Sunday morning. He’s wearing his best suit and stands straight with a strained face as he tries to hide his nerves. The last two weeks have been absolutely excruciating for them both. He barely slept in the last three days.

Kenji’s face lights up when they spot each other. She screams his name and runs at him, jumping up so he has to catch her mid-air as they crash into each other. Taylor wraps her legs around his waist and drapes her arms over his shoulders as he stumbles five steps back before finding his balance.

People around them stop to look at the happy reunion.

When she steps down they face off three feet from each other and Taylor bows like she has seen in anime TV shows.

“Tadaima Shishō!” (I’m home master!) She controls her emotions and plainly greets him.

He smiles approvingly and pets her on the head.

He quietly welcomes her, “Yatto Teirā ga kitekurete ureshī yo.” (Good to finally have you here Taylor.)

Taylor hurries and gets her suitcase that stands way behind her where she abandoned it and they head for the train station.

Taylor has been awarded a Long Stay visa with Kenji as her sponsor and a job his friend invented for her. Kenji’s friend owns a convenience store around the corner of where they live. The man doesn't need a shop assistant, but for all intents and purposes she’ll work there to do the accounts and handle the cash register. She’ll probably never see the backroom of the store or be behind the counter.

The government doesn’t need to know that though.

Hello! It's the first day of my new life. I’m so excited!

We took the high speed rail from Tokyo and spent the entire afternoon on his patio chatting and enjoying the little garden. We set up a second futon in the bedroom and he finally shows me around his house. I love the traditional look and feel he has created. It's like stepping 100 years back in time if you ignore the computer in the corner, the kitchen appliances and the TV in the living room.

That night I feel like I've lived here for years already. I'm so comfortable with him and the whole place. It's weird really. Maybe I'm just tired, but he says it’s because the energy is really good here.

Whatever that means, right?

We sleep early, or I do anyway. Draped over my man across both futons. I’m actually very tired from my final week in Houston and the long flight.

It's my first time ever sleeping on a Futon and it will take some getting used to. The thin mattress on the floor is not nearly as comfortable as my bed was. But then, I’ve slept for months in Jenna’s cage… It’s quite comfortable if you think about it like that.

I wake up the next morning and consider checking out the kitchen to maybe make coffee or something for Kenji. He has to leave for work in an hour.

Kenji has thought of something to do for me already. To make sure I soak in the atmosphere of my new home he thought it a good idea to start with some homely welcome bondage.

I’m sitting on the patio with my back straight against a roof support beam. He chose this spot because it’s exactly in the middle of his U shaped house. I will be right at the center of our world. Inside the U is a little garden with some white gravel and plants. Almost every room of the house has a sliding door onto a patio that surrounds this garden area.

The whole house has a narrow walled garden around it as well, but it’s mostly a bunch of unkempt bushes and bamboo and some small trees. This makes it so that it feels like the house is in a forested area instead of a city. It’s raining and water is dripping from the roof, it’s falling down inches from my face as I look into the garden.

I stare straight ahead as I wait for Kenji to come home from work. I’m kneeling with my arms pulled behind me and around the thick beam, he used a simple tie to bind my wrists together. My neck is tied to the support beam. I can’t move up or down, It's a bit tight so I can barely turn my head. Under my shins is a thin little cushion for some comfort.

I’m of-course completely naked. Because of how my arms are positioned my breasts are pushed out a little, accentuating their roundness. Anyone walking into the inner garden can see what a pervert I am. But luckily for me nobody will ever enter this area of the house when he isn’t home. He said so anyway.

Kenji had taken my photo when he was done with me. I didn’t expect it so he caught me looking all calm and innocent. I quickly got upset. I don’t like having my picture taken when I’m like this.

He said that he wants to chronicle our adventures with artsy photos of the things we do. Also normal photos, without bondage or anything kinky. He showed me the preview on his camera and I have to agree that he’s a good photographer. I look like a real Japanese bondage model, except I’m a blonde with green eyes. But you know what I mean.

Still… I’m not a porn model. And I cursed at him.

He assured me that it’s not porn. He left me to stew in my disagreement and went to work.

I think lunchtime is about to pass when the rain finally stops, when the clouds clear soon after I enjoy the sunny view, it’s so peaceful. But later that afternoon I just feel bored and sleepy and my back hurts from sitting straight and unmoving for so long.

Suddenly a door slides open behind me. I try to see if it’s Kenji but I can’t really turn my head.

From behind a hand caresses my cheek and I smile.

“Okaerinasai, Shishō” (Welcome home, master!)

I whisper, knowing it’s Kenji. He says nothing but kisses me behind my ear. And disappears without making a sound. I didn’t even see him. I wish to see my man…

I call out to him, “Kenji, nomimono o moratte mo ī?” (Can I have a drink Kenji?)

I didn’t need to ask though, as he’s already in the kitchen and when he returns he feeds me a drink and I greedily swallow and lick my lips at him.

My Japanese is basic, but I know enough by now to manage groceries and buy a bus ticket, I think. Kenji and I have had simple conversations through messenger. I feel really smart for learning his crazy language in only a few months and he praised me for trying.

I love it when he praises me.

He still doesn’t say a word but his gaze pierces into me. I feel small and insignificant.

“Aishiteruyo, Teirā. Yōkoso!” (I love you, Taylor. Welcome home!)

We grin at each other and before I can say anything back he leaves me alone and makes dinner. I wonder what’s going through his mind. I pull on my bonds but I’m still stuck.

“Yeah… Love you too, Kenji.” I quietly say.

I kinda wish to be free so I can help cook. Or just stretch my limbs.

Soon smells of food fill the home and Kenji returns. He kneels to my side and feeds me my dinner. Some kind of grilled fish and rice. It’s all a little spicy. The neck rope pulls my head against the beam so I can only look straight ahead and shift my eyes so I’m not sure what I’m eating or what he’s doing. He is just outside of my peripheral vision.

"Fish?" I ask.

"Salmon with pepper."

Omg, salmon is so expensive.

"That's super expensive right?" I wonder. I know Kenji isn't exactly rich.

"No, not in Japan." Kenji tells me and feeds me another big bite.

"I like it though!" I compliment his cooking.

He smiles at me and tells me about his day. Kenji sounds happy as he tells me how his work-mates all cheered for him when he told them I had arrived.

His little group of co-workers had been anticipating my arrival for weeks. They all know how unhappy Kenji was before he met me and hope for better times for their buddy.

“That’s good to hear. Maybe one day you can introduce me to them?” I suggest with my mouth full of fish.

“Yes, maybe.” Kenji agrees.

He likes to keep work and private life separate though.

“Did you learn anything today Teirā?” He changes the subject when I finish my portion, he’s having his.

I think for a while, “The rain was beautiful.” I tell him. “I never noticed it.”

He agrees. “Yes, nature is beautiful.”

We’re quiet for a moment.

“Anything else?” He wants to know.

I think for a few seconds again. “Just anything?”

He tenderly strokes my cheek.

“You can take my picture.” I hesitantly approve of his supposed hobby.

He smiles unseen by me.

When I think he’s not going to respond, I continue. “But not for porn right? Or for online? It’ll be private?”

“Yes Teirā. Nobody in the world will ever see you naked and vulnerable except for me. Unless you allow it.” He promises me.

“Arigatō, Shishō.” (Thank you master.) I agree.

So be it. I’ll be his bondage model.

He strokes my leg and rests his head on my thighs, looking up at me. I can barely see him.

“Why do you love me? Kenji? You never told me.” I ask him. I really don’t know why he likes me. Or why he is so into me. We’ve been chatting every day, for months, and I never thought to ask. I’m such a shallow dumbo, right? But then, our love comes so naturally… It doesn’t need to be said or discussed really.

It just is.

“Teirā… I…” Kenji tries to sound strong and manly. But his wavering voice betrays his emotions.

I cast my eyes down and catch a glimpse of him. I wish I could reach out and caress his face.

“Tell me Kenji. Anything…” I encourage him.

He wipes his face.

“For the past few years I’ve not been happy with my life. And when I saw you at my brother’s house I finally got the courage to try and fix it.” Kenji admits. He nestles his head against my stomach.

“Ok, but…” I start to say, but he interrupts me.

“I thought since you're just a stupid foreigner I could take advantage of you and throw all my frustrations at you. It wouldn't matter right? You were going away anyway and it wouldn't matter how you felt about it.”

I frown at his evil plan as he continues his story.

“But after we had sex I couldn't do that to you. You were… Different. So instead I did some of the things I wanted to do to my wife. Then I threw you out hoping I could move past it and be happy with her.” Kenji tells his story.

“What? Your wife? Why?”

He continues, “It didn’t work at all, my few days with you only made my marriage worse.”

I say nothing. A weird, almost sad, emotion comes over me. What a strange story. I don’t know what to think.

Kenji sighs and continues his story, “Because I felt trapped in my marriage I got this house. I often stayed here to get away from my wife and kids. I told her I was away on business. I put all my savings in it to make it the way it is. That way I at least have my dream house.”

I shift my eyes and try to see him while I smile, “I like this house. It’s beautiful. Just like in anime I’ve seen.”

A sense of arousal comes over me. Instead of being angry at him for his abusive plan, or for running away from his wife. I consider that he did all of it for me. Because he wants to have and love me.

I also realize that I don't care at all about his ex-wife or kids. I have zero interest in hearing about his marriage as long as he thinks I'm the better choice. That's weird right? Super selfish maybe?

“You turned my world upside down. I couldn't forget about you. You’re so pure. I… well…” His voice trails off.

I laugh, “No I’m not, I’m a dumb nerd and totally ordinary…” I refuse his compliment.

“You awakened. It’s beautiful, don’t you see it?”

“An awakening? Maybe, but… I have no skills. I’m not especially smart, I don’t think. I’m just boring Taylor.”

“Teirā, no. You couldn’t be boring or ordinary if you tried.” He pinches my nose.

I smile at him. Thinking he’s just being sweet. And I still don’t really understand what makes me so special.

Maybe he likes my character… Yeah right! Nobody can love me for that. So he probably just loves my freckled face…

“Tell me sometime Kenji. Anytime you’re ready, OK?” I offer my support to my man.

I feel him nod.

“I love you so much… Never let me go, OK?” I whisper at him.

“I won’t Teirā… I love you too.” Kenji acknowledges with his kind voice.

He then gets up and undoes my simple bindings. I sit rubbing my chafed neck and wrists when he kneels in front of me. He bows so deep that his forehead is touching the ground, his hands on either side of his head.

“I should’ve never returned you to my brother! I’m so very sorry for all the pain and suffering I caused you by letting you go home. Maybe someday you can forgive me for that.” He apologizes to me.

“Kenji…” I say with tears in my eyes, how can I blame him for the past year. I can’t. I caress his face and kiss the back of his head.

“I forgive you, no! I don’t even blame you… I did that all on my own. Come, sit up…” I whisper next to his head.

We look at each other for a moment. The air is laden with emotion.

“If you ever feel frustrated, or need to unload stress. I’m here for you. Don’t hold back.” I whisper, offering myself to him without considering myself.

Yes, I’m also a masochist…

But only for him!

13 - Out in public

It's been four months since I arrived in Japan. During the weekdays we mostly take it easy. We're a proper couple and really get to know each other. It truly is a dream come true to be with Kenji.

He's a proud man, and a great lover. Every week I love Kenji more and more.

And that’s no wonder, he’s funny, considerate, we go for walks. He teaches me how to cook, how Japan and how the city works. Things to look out for, everything I need to know about life. He introduced me to my 'employer' a while ago. He's a funny man who loves anime too. I buy stuff at the little shop regularly.

Sometimes I even help out with the cash register. As I’m supposed to.

Every weekend I become Chijo and I often dangle from a beam in the bedroom, or some kind of hogtie or something similar and we ‘relax’ around the house. Ever watched TV while tied up? Or took a shower tied in a full-body rope harness? Ever been stretched hanging into an X between patio beams?

I have! It's super exciting!

More recently Kenji has been a bit more experimental with our activities. Like he keeps looking to push boundaries or something. Something is off, but I can't quite put my finger on it. I did notice I have to do more and more chores and things for him or he'll punish me. He often uses bondage and some pain as my reward.

It's a naughty routine really, and I quite like it. It's exciting to see him inspect my work for the day. And if my efforts are to his liking, say the kitchen is clean enough, or the plants are neatly trimmed, I get a good reward. The better I do, the more he uses the paddle or the tighter and more difficult my bondage is.

If I didn't do a good job he ignores me for the night and refuses to do any bondage or even touch me. Obviously I try to do better the next day so I can get my reward.

Today it's Wednesday, Kenji got the day off for some public holiday and he promised me a special day, something different.

I'm not sure why he decided on today's activity. But yes, it's very different…

I fidget with my skirt and feel wholly uncomfortable. He told me to take a train wearing this ridiculous outfit and he’ll wait for me at the end.

I’m 21 for god sake! Why am I wearing a teenager school uniform? You know, blue skirt, white blouse with the sailor flap thing on the back. A red tie hangs from under my collar. He even gave me a school issue book bag. He didn’t give me the time to look at a mirror but I imagine I look like a 16 year old.

I don’t think my skirt is supposed to be this short though. It stops about mid-thigh. Absolutely ridiculous. And what’s worse. Like, way way worse… He made me wear a remote vibrator that he controls via the internet. You know, one of those ribbed egg shaped things with something like an antenna sticking out of the vagina? It connects through some app on my phone and bluetooth I think.

He had dropped me off at the train station near our house and he said he’ll wait for me in Kakegawa.

There are maybe 50 people on the platform waiting for the train. I think that more than half of them don’t notice me, or ignore me. But the rest? I feel their stares.

I don’t look Japanese at all. You know, because I have blonde hair, freckles and green eyes? I'm very much a white girl! And every step I take I feel the vibrator shift inside me. Surely everyone around me notices that too.

Kenji said I should enjoy myself and learn from the experience. But what the fuck is there to learn from this other than that I'm an enticing piece of ass for bystanders to gawk at. I dread the moment the vibrator comes on. It's a porno waiting to happen!

Or… Yes, I’ll sabotage him! I can't do this.

I run into the station restroom and pull out the sex toy. I can’t help but moan quietly as the ridges slide along my lips. Next I set my phone to airplane mode and drop both in my bookbag.

Fuck that shit. I’m not doing this.

I barely make the train and ride it leaving Shizuoka towards Kakegawa. It’ll be a 90 minute ride with a dozen or so stops.

I nervously sit with my back straight in the corner of the last wagon and try to be as invisible as possible. But people curiously look at the foreigner wearing a strange school uniform.

I feel so uncomfortable.

At the 3rd station a man sits next to me, like real close. Our knees touch. This isn’t happening! I scream in my mind and I lean to my left, against the wall, and look at my feet.

But nothing happens and he gets off the train two stations further. He didn’t touch me.

Next a girl in a similar uniform to mine sits next to me, she’s like fourteen I think. We awkwardly smile at each other. Her skirt is way longer than mine.

“Kon'nichiwa. Doko no gakkō shusshindesu ka?” (Hello. What school are you from?)

I stare at her, trying to understand her words. She curiously looks me over as if she’s looking for something.

“Seifuku ni gakkō no māku ga haittenai ndesu ka?” (Your uniform doesn’t have school markings?)

I have no school markings, insignia or anything… She does, on her collar and chest are a school logo and initials.

“Watashi wa gakkō ni itte imasen…” (I’m not in school…) I quietly reply.

She looks at me for a second and comes to the correct conclusion. She quietly accuses me, “Hentai!” (Pervert)

I say nothing and wish the earth would swallow me and I stare straight ahead, my head red from embarrassment.

As soon as the seat next to her frees up she scoots over. She gets off three stops later, giving me a dirty look.

She’s replaced by another man at the next stop, he leans into me and comes so close that I pull my skirt down to hide my legs and escape to the other end of the train.

I catch my reflection in a door window and I am startled at how cute and flustered I look. For all intents and purposes I am a 16 year old girl right now. Nobody will think otherwise, I’m sure. At the other end of the train with my back turned to the wagon I carefully feel my panties and they’re soaking wet.

“Fuck!” I mutter, Control yourself Taylor! I’m so upset with myself right now. I’m not at all enjoying this, but still I get off on it.

At the second last station the train is almost empty and I’m the only one in the wagon. Facing the corner, I gingerly push the vibrator back inside me and disable Airplane mode. Just so Kenji won't suspect me of cheating.

Immediately the vibrator starts buzzing inside me and I yelp in surprise. I control my breathing and turn around. A man stares at me from the other end of the wagon. Fuck! Where did he come from?

Ignoring his stare I stumble to the door where I hold on to a pole. I look outside with unfocused eyes while rubbing my thighs together. I'm already getting super horny!

I’m quietly moaning, and try to distract myself from my arousal. Suddenly the man joins me and we wait for the train to stop so we can exit the train. A drip runs down my leg and disappears into my shoe.

Oh my god, this is so bad. I think as I bite my lip and clutch the pole. My entire being is focused on not letting on what's going on.

The man next to me sniffles and looks around him. Can he smell my arousal? Blood rushes to my head and I feel super embarrassed yet again. When the train finally stops I don’t wait for the door to fully open and squeeze out when it’s halfway.

Enough! Where is the exit? Where is Kenji?

The station exit is at the end of the platform, just three steps down and I'm on the street but Kenji is not there. I’m so horny by now, I desperately look around for a place to orgasm and get rid of the vibrator.

The sex toy is relentless. And where is Kenji? He should be here!

I check my phone but there is no message either. Down the street I see a public toilet and almost run to the entrance. Just as I step inside a hand clamps over my mouth and I’m roughly pulled into the disabled toilet.

I let out a muffled scream and stumble sideways into the stall.

“Teirā!” Comes Kenji’s excited whisper.

Oh my god, it’s Kenji! Am I that predictable? He could just wait in the nearest toilet because he knew I would go there.

Geez…

I turn around and slap him on his shoulder.

“Damn you! Do you know how scared and humiliated I am?”

I reach down to my crotch and want to remove the vibrator. But Kenji prevents me from reaching and holds my hands on my back.

“But you're also aroused, yes?“

"Wh… What?" I stammer. But yes, I'm super aroused.

He looks me in my eyes and silently demands his answer.

"Yes, well… I've been embarrassed and horny the whole way!" I whisper, my face flushes red just saying that. I lean into him, resting my head on his right shoulder.

He embraces me with his right arm and reaches down with the other. Some fidgeting with my panties and he slowly pulls the buzzing monster out of me and turns it off.

"Oh, gawd. Yes!" I moan, finally no more teasing torment.

Kenji pushes me upright and he squats down in front of me. With a quick wipe with some toilet paper he 'cleans' the sex toy and it disappears into my bag.

I follow his every move like a hawk.

Next he wipes my vagina and the insides of my legs with toilet paper as well. I whimper at his touch. When he wipes again I have to steady myself on his shoulder and let out a moan.

I can't stand his casual silence as he does his things and I moan at him, “Kenji, make me cum! Please please, I need it so bad.”

“Tsk tsk tsk, we’re in a public toilet.” He quietly rejects me, he doesn't even look up at me as he clicks his tongue.

I feel humiliated and slutty. Kenji gets up and kisses me on my cheek and makes a neat little ponytail in my hair. Yeah, no. Now I can't hide my face at all. But I make no attempt to undo the tie.

“Let’s go see Kakegawa Castle!” He announces with an excited voice, ignoring my state of arousal.

I just stare at him.

“It’s really nice with the blossoms this time of the year… We’ll take some photos.” He adds.

I keep staring at him.

“Kidding right?” I finally manage.

“No.”

“In public… Wearing this?” I quietly disagree. He must be joking.

“Kenji please, baby, all these weirdo games. Last week too with the, eh, enema…” I cringe at the humiliating memory, “Am I boring you? Is your life not exciting enough anymore?” I look down at the floor.

I don’t want to argue about his choices. But this is so far outside of my comfort zone. A sudden sadness overwhelms me. Maybe he is getting bored with me… He did run out on his wife and kids, what’s to stop him from doing that to me as well?

He's ignorant to my worries and looks me up and down, "What's wrong with it?”

“No, listen to me… Understand!” I interrupt him, “I love you. You know I do. I’ll follow you to the end of the world. You can tie me, hurt me, love or ignore me. But I won’t do public and humiliation stuff.” I quietly say.

I gesture at my outfit and rant on, "I think this, is very embarrassing… I'm not a teenager, I'm not in school. And look!" I tug on the skirt. "Too short!"

He says nothing for a moment. Looking me over once again. And stares at me with his piercing eyes.

“Do as you told Chijo!” He quietly commands me.

I stare at him with nervous eyes but my resolve evaporates as he looks at me with his commanding eyes.

We have a tiny stand-off but I submit all the same, "Hai Shishō!"

Instantly defeated, I let my head drop down and stare at my feet. Fuck! What is wrong with me? Why can't I ever stand up to anyone? And what of today? This is his new way of hurting me? Public humiliation?

I’m not sure that I can agree with it, but it’s exciting all the same.

Kenji promises me he'll punish me for my outburst just now, and grabs my hand while we leave the toilet building.

We walk up the hill and actually have fun at the castle. It's a beautiful place. He takes many pictures of it, and me. I just pretend I'm his adopted daughter or something. To ease my discomfort. If you think of me as a 15 or 16 year old, he's literally twice my age. So awkward…

All afternoon I feel everyone's eyes burn into me. People stare at us, me. But Kenji doesn't seem to notice at all. Maybe it’s all in my head.

That night he made good on his promise to punish me and I spent all night tied up in a tight rope harness with the magic wand pressing against my vagina. I’m allowed one frustrating orgasm after hours of denial. When he finally pulls the plug around midnight I immediately fall into a restless sleep.

Today reminds me of Jenna and I’m not sure what to think about that.

The next day he tells me to scrub and clean the entire patio and rake the gravel in the center area. I'm to make the floor gleam and shine like new. And no, I can't wear clothes.

He threatens that if I don't do a good enough job he won't hurt me. The lure of pain as a reward is exciting!

"Uhm… Kenji?" I cautiously wonder.

"Yes Teirā?"

"Are you turning me into your house slave?" I ask, I had a good think about recent months and came to the conclusion I am pretty much his servant. Everything I do is for him, because of him. My entire being revolves around him.

It sure looks like our relationship is going that way, even though he doesn't treat me like a lesser person.

"I don't believe in slavery." Kenji says, "But it would probably amuse us both to make you a servant for a while."

"I think so too… Maybe." I hesitantly agree.

"I'll take the opportunity to teach you some structure and manners as well."

"Manners? Why? What's wrong with my manners?"

"People around us think you're rude and uncivilized." Kenji unkindly tells me.

"Oh… But… Really? Why?" I quietly say. I don't think it's that bad. But I do curse a lot. Maybe he means that?

"Don't worry my dear, I'll teach you and show you the way!" Kenji promises. "Think about how you see yourself as a servant and tell me when I get home."

A doubt creeps in my mind. I can be his servant AND girlfriend, too? Knowing him he’ll probably follow some tradition of the old days and make me a true servant. But then I’m no longer his girl… I don’t want that.

"Hai Shishō! I’ll think about it today!" I reluctantly agree.

We kiss each other goodbye and I get to work.

During the day I make up my mind. I don’t want to be Kenji’s servant. I want to be his wife!

The more I think about it, the more I want it. I’ll wear kimonos and be all traditional. I’ll be strong and determined. And I’ll be obedient and be everything he wants or needs.

I’ll be someone he can be super proud of.

Maybe I should actually work a few days per week in his friend’s little store to get me out of the house and make some friends and improve my Japanese?

Surely Kenji will appreciate that, too.

I’m crazy right? A complete idiot… Surely you’d think so.

But it will be perfect!

~~ The end ~~